True friendship none of that sissy c***?!

True friendship none of that sissy c***?

Are you tired of those sissy "friendship" poems that always sound good,
but never actually come close to reality?
Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true
friendship.a
You will see no cutesy little smiley faces-
just the stone cold truth of our great friendship.
1. When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge
against the sorry bastard who made you sad.
2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
3. When you smile -- I will know you finally got laid.
4. When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it every chance I get.
5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how
Much worse it could be until you quit whining.
6. When you are confused -- I will use little words.
7. When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well
again. I don't want whatever you have.
8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy ***.
-----Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.
-----And always remember....when life hands you Lemons, ask for tequila and salt and call me over !!!!!

I have tequila and salt Sweetie! You bring along the lemons! LOL!!!