I cant believe anymore..PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME!!?(Sorry,this shld be in Religion!

I cant believe anymore..PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME!!?(Sorry,this shld be in Religion,but wth!)?

Ive been a Christian all my life,well,Most of it(lol),thanx to my mom being a Minister and all.Well,there are certain things I dont believe in Christianity.I dont believe in "God's Will" - that he can take you through "the Wilderness" in order to bring you out and make you see his Glory.If he wanted Us to Praise him for something he did for us,why not just let us Praise him for something he did,rather than Taking us thru hell?
Anyway,I also dont believe in "A plan" that God has for all of us.
We all are "children" or God,and he loves us equally.Right now,there is a kid in Somalia or wherever who died coz he didnt have any food to eat.And if he gets a Biscuit to eat,He is soo thankful to God for Providing him food.
In the Bible,there are certain cases where God "Delivered the enemies of Israel into their hands,and they(Israel) killed them(Enemies)"
In the same Bible,it says its wrong to take Human life.Its a sin actually.And how come they wrote the bible,events from the 1st Century

I went through a similar experience in my life. Mine seemed to go one step forward and doubt the very existence of God. My recommendation to you is be completely honest when you are talking to God. Tell Him what you do and do not believe. What happened to me I can not explain, but I believe that when we become honest with ourselves and God that through that experience we go through a turning point in our lives.