Social Anxiety Disorder or really shy Gemini?!


Question:

Social Anxiety Disorder or really shy Gemini?

I don't really believe in all that horoscope stuff (something seeming to dictate my life is just plain wrong...), but everything that I have read/heard about it says that Gemini's (of which I am one) are extroverted by nature and extremely talkitive. I can't think of anyone I know who could possibly be anything less than me. Strangely enough though, I'm not like that at all on the Internet. Lately I've been opening up more and more and little by little to people around me, but it's hard and I get scared out of my mind for some reason whenever I try: my heart beats really fast and hard (I can actually see my chest moving: it hurts!), I get a massive headache, I start sweating all over, and my respiration gets erratic. My mind keeps telling me over and over that I'm weak, that I shouldn't be feeling the way I do and that I'm pathetic whenever I have a simple conversation with anyone, but I can't help it. Why do you think this is? Do I have SAD or am I just extremely shy?

Additional Details

2 months ago
I grew up as the only white kid on an Indian Reservation; those were six years of pure Hell for me. The thing is, no one exactly beat me up or anything, they just called me names every now and then, pushed me around a little bit, and humiliated me at every opportunity; it actually wasn't a half-bad place to go to grade school; I still had a few [occasionally disloyal] friends and all. But still...could that have anything to with it?

2 months ago
I just now looked it up: My rising sign is Sagittarius, Moon is Taurus, and Mercury is Cancer.

2 months ago
I was born on Wednesday, June 16, 1993, at 18:01 at night in Kingman, AZ.


Answers:

There are some good reasons why you would be experiencing these problems. I will submit my full analysis shortly.

Here it is-

Firstly, I should point out to you that, even though you are a Gemini, this does not inevitabley mean that you are talkative. Gemini is ruled by Mercury, the planet of communication. What this basically means is that the issue of communication will be dominant in your life, but not necessarily in a positive way. From what you write, it seems that Mercury is working negatively for you. Rather than being communicative, it is your difficulty with communication that is defining you at the moment.

Secondly, you need to stop telling yourself that you are weak for giving in to your anxieties. When Mercury is not working well in a person's chart, it can cause all sorts of uncontrollable anxieties. (You can trust me on this, because in the past, I experienced a very similar problem to yours, so I can totally relate to what you are saying).

Now for the possible astrological causes. One of the most common causes of anxiety and reluctance to communicate is a Mercury retrograde in the chart. If you have had your birth chart done, check to see if the letter "R" appears next to your Mercury position. This signifies a Mercury retrograde, and in this position, Mercury can cause the type of problems you are experiencing. If the letter "R" does not appear, check also the dates immediately after your birth (perhaps up to 20 days) and see whether Mercury turned retrograde soon after your birth. This would also cause problems for you.

Other indications of communication problems are
-Mercury making a strong aspect to Saturn in the chart
-Saturn in the 3rd house of Gemini

Now for the "solution". The fact that you have been opening up more lately is a VERY good sign. It means that your birth chart is receiving some positive influences, probably from the transiting planets. Even when Mercury is negatively aspected in the chart, there will be periods of respite when positive influences occur.

I know that you aren't that into astrology, but I highly recommend you have your birth chart done, if you haven't done it already, and see what is going on with your Mercury. In my case, knowing astrology really helped me understand my own problems. Best of all, it helped me to know when the problems would ease. It might do the same for you.

Good luck and best wishes :)

.................................

I'm glad you looked up your chart. Would you be happy to list all your planet and sign placements (including Venus, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn etc down to Pluto)? Or would you be willing to provide your date, place and time of birth? If so, I can take a look at your chart and tell you what I find.

.................................

Hi Alya,

Thanks for your chart details.

You do, indeed, have Saturn in the third house. This is the house which is ruled by Gemini and communication. Saturn is the planet of restrictions. When it is placed in the third house, it creates communication problems.

Moreover, even though you were not born with Mercury retrograde, it did turn retrograde 15 days after you were born, so that is adding to your communication anxieties.

These placements and influences can be a real pain to Geminis because good communication is so important to them.

However, the good news is that the problem will not be consistent. There will be periods when the problem will ease and communication will feel much more comfortable. One of those happy periods is actually approaching for you. From April to June next year, Jupiter (the planet of good fortune) will be transiting your Mercury. You are very likely to feel much more confident in expressing yourself during this period, and any form of study should also be very fortunate.

Another piece of good news is that this is not a life-long problem. The older you get, the more comfortable and confident you will become with expressing yourself. Your placements simply mean that it will take you just a little bit longer to be the Gemini you long to be :)

To help you understand more, I highly recommend doing some research on Saturn in the third house. Here are a couple of sites to help you along -

http://www.skyviewzone.com/astrology/pla...

http://www.trans4mind.com/personal_devel...

You could also research Mercury/Saturn contacts in the birth chart, since these have the identical effect to Saturn in the third house. Here's a good site for that topic as well -

http://www.cafeastrology.com/natal/mercu...

Good luck and best wishes :)


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