Females - What is your sun/moon and what is your mother's sun/moon?!
Question: And do you get along well or not so well? If you don't, have you looked further into your/her traits in an attempt to be closer?
Me/Mom's basics:
Me: Scorpio Sun/Gemini Moon/Scorpio Mercury/Virgo Venus/Leo Mars
Mom: Cancer Sun/Cancer Moon/Cancer Mercury/Cancer Venus/Pisces Mars
We do not get along well. However, I am always polite to her. Although once in a while, I just loose it. Obviously/generally, Gemini and Cancer do not mix well. I have Aquarius and Saturn in Cancer's 4th house. I have Mars opposite Saturn.
I wish I knew of some way to sway her tendancy towards negativity/criticism - but its very strong in her. Although she has very good traits, including a good sense of humor, she does have that classic Cancer moodiness/negativity in an extreme, that no-one comes close to, and unfortunately, it is her dominant personality. Understandable, as she has so much in her chart (I suspect she is Cancer rising as well)
How can I help maintain her good side?
Answers: And do you get along well or not so well? If you don't, have you looked further into your/her traits in an attempt to be closer?
Me/Mom's basics:
Me: Scorpio Sun/Gemini Moon/Scorpio Mercury/Virgo Venus/Leo Mars
Mom: Cancer Sun/Cancer Moon/Cancer Mercury/Cancer Venus/Pisces Mars
We do not get along well. However, I am always polite to her. Although once in a while, I just loose it. Obviously/generally, Gemini and Cancer do not mix well. I have Aquarius and Saturn in Cancer's 4th house. I have Mars opposite Saturn.
I wish I knew of some way to sway her tendancy towards negativity/criticism - but its very strong in her. Although she has very good traits, including a good sense of humor, she does have that classic Cancer moodiness/negativity in an extreme, that no-one comes close to, and unfortunately, it is her dominant personality. Understandable, as she has so much in her chart (I suspect she is Cancer rising as well)
How can I help maintain her good side?
Hi Catwoman,
Me: Sun - Sagittarius; Moon - Libra
Mom: Sun - Aries, Moon - Pisces
We have had a complicated relationship.
Mother in law: Sun - Cancer; Moon - Leo
I cannot relate to her at all. I have tried and tried, but the Cancer/Leo combination makes her abusive, controlling, negative and self-absorbed. My latest technique is to refuse communication unless she conducts herself civily and without crazy double messages. So far, it has been working but I must be vigilant. Polite and respectful has never worked in the past so I have to step out of my comfort zone to enforce my new method of standing my ground.
Regarding your mother with all that Cancer going on - it must be very difficult for you as well as her. It sounds like she is a victim of all those water and cardinal traits. If only we could choose our natal blueprints. The Saturn in the 4th with a Mars opposition does suggest that she has had a somewhat depressing influence on your life with occasional periods of extreme anger. I don't think you will ever be able to change her - maybe modify how she treats you (behavior) to a certain extent. Set limits on what you will accept and not accept from her, and if her behavior is out of line, leave and leave again until she learns to control herself.
As you can see from your answers, you are not alone in enduring a difficult relationship with your mother. Lots & lots of people have similar stories. I wish you the best in learning effective coping strategies.
Mom--Scorpio(Sun) Sagittarius (Moon)
Me--Sagittarius (Sun) Virgo (Moon)
We don't agree on everything but we are close and get along pretty well. certain issues we just agree to disagree kind of thing. She doesn't like to be in the middle of any arguement and will do anything to keep peace. She also lets my sister (**who is a virgo(sun) Taurus (moon)**) tell her what to do and also take advantage of her...which makes me mad that she lets her do it... My sister and I don't get along..not that I havent tried, she just doesnt want to I don't guess...
I wish I had advice for that, in fact I need that advice too! Every virgo in my family seems negatively pesimistic...like the world is conspiring against them (in particular my aunt and mother in law who have same bday--09/07)
hey girl! :)
i wanna answer this but i gotta get ready to go again.
so i'll be back to answer later tonight, keep the question open please! hehe. :)
but here's the basics for me and my mom...
Me: Sun Scorpio, Moon Scorpio, Mercury Sagittarius, Venus Capricorn, Mars Aquarius.
Mom: Sun Gemini, Moon Taurus, Mercury Gemini, Venus Gemini, Mars Virgo.
We get along great, I think of her as one of my best friends when she's not being a b*tch and when i'm not a being a b*tch. haha. yah, we have that mother-daughter relationship that we can talk that way to each other and not take it seriously. LOL. :P She has a way with words, that when she says certain things i listen..and i believe what she says, i guess it's that gemini in mercury.
I just looked up my mom's chart the other day, cuz i was curious... and i'm thinking so THAT'S why we get along well, most times. :)
Me: Scorpio sun/Scorpio moon/Scorpio mercury/Scorpio venus/Scorpio mars
Mom: Virgo sun/Scorpio moon/Libra mercury/Libra venus/Cancer mars
We get along pretty well. Our personalities are somewhat similar, except she's a bit more talkative and outgoing than me. The only thing we tend to argue about is her over-protectiveness. She's a great mother and friend - I'm very lucky.
As for your question, I think it's difficult to sway someone's negativity or moodiness. I guess the best thing is not to take it too personal.
Scorpio sun/Gemini moon... the both of us, really.
Me: scorpio sun, gemini moon, sagittarius mercury, sagittarius venus, capricorn mars.
Sun in 12th, moon in 7th, mercury and venus in 1st and mars in 2nd
Mum: scorpio sun, gemini moon, scorpio mercury, scorpio venus, sagittarius mars.
Sun in 4th (on the cusp of 5th), moon in 12th, mercury in 4th (on the cusp of 5th), venus in 5th, mars in 5th.
We are pretty much the same, only she is louder and more self confident than I am, and less open to new things. We used to always fight and when we did it was intense (we both have mars square pluto so it could get bad) and she was too dominant (she has cancer rising as well! [lol]). She likes to help people but initially she can be quite selfish in her behaviour.
Assuming your mother has most of her chart in the 1st house; good luck. All that cancer with aries energy will never conform to anything.
My mom and I are the reverse of each other. I'm a Scorpio with a Gemini moon. She is a Gemini with a Scorpio moon. She is hard to get along with in general. I just don't take it personally. Which is the best advice I can offer, as our mothers are not going to change.
Me : sun sag/moon Leo
Her: Sun Cancer/moon aries
And we absolutely do not get along at all. She is extremely moody and gets very nasty when angry. Very self-absorbed and her needs also have to come first at all times.
It also has to do a lot with her relationship with my father too.(sun Cap/libra moon) but ....it is a hornest nest here; too damn complicated to explain with a few lines.
We have a totally different philosophy in life, completely different interests etc........we just do not get along and never had.
I have tried to understand "what" makes her but no.....have given up !
My brother is also estranged from her (Taurus Sun/Gem moon)
It just seems that she has scared off everybody anyway..(I think she is deeply unbalanced..but would not dare tell her..)
Since I have such a poor relationship with mine..gosh I do not know how I could advise you to get along with yours.
Me: Sun Sag / Moon Cappy
Mom: Sun Leo / Moon Scorpio
What more Can I say..?
We are just like best friends!
"Mom! I miss you!!!" (Shouting inside my heart)
Your mum has cardinal signs galore, so she's quite the control freak. You can maintain her good side by listening to her - I dont know much about cancers - I live with one, and I saw that she can be pushy, domineering and emotionally manipulative. I just can't solve it. The only way to make her cheerful is to do things for her. Cancer is the caring sign, but it seems they like people doing thigs for them.
Me:Libra Sun/Virgo Moon/Libra Merc/Libra Venus/Sag Mars
Mum: Scorpio sun/ Cancer Moon/ Libra merc/ Libra Venus/ Sag Mars
My mum and me are so alike - look at venus sextile mars. She has her sun in the 10th and venus in the 9th just like me.
My mother is a very indulgent one. That means, she does everything for me when I ask for help. With that cancer moon it's no wonder. She's not a good teacher - she's a good do-er, and good overtaker. She's bossy and likes having things done her way. She can say something and then do another - happens all the time, like for example, she says i cant do that, but she does it, and when i call her out for it, she pretends she never said it before.
Generally she is okay, but we irritate each other - I prefer a more emotionally indulgent mum. She's always at loggerheads with me. In effect, she likes to "control" me, and has been until I broke the chains.
Hi Catwoman!
Me: Cap Sun/Leo Moon
Her: Virgo Sun/Aqua Moon
I'm an Aqua rising and she's a Libra rising. We get along great...We both have Sun in 12th house and almost all of the times we do speak the same "language"
I first dropped a glance at her chart when I wanted to see what makes so alike in many ways. The truth is that since both of us are Earth/Air people it is easy to get along with her.
I noticed that your mum has a considerable Water influence in her chart. In case she's a Cancer rising, as well, that makes her a triple Cancer.However, I believe that you have all the necessary tools to get your message across..
Your Sun signs are compatible, your Sun with her Moon, Mercury, Venus and Mars are compatible. The same goes for your Mercury and Venus. The only thing that possible gets in the way is your Moon combination.
Considering all that Water influnce in her chart, perhaps being "polite" to her is not enough. Most probably she wants to "feel" in order to act.
Now this Saturn presence in the house of Cancer may not be very helpful, I have to admit.Perhaps she senses you as cold and detached...even aloof while in your home environment. And you have to note that Cancers (let alone triple ones) value all their familiar people or things very much.
I'm sure she cares a great deal about you...her maternal instincts must be very strong. Cancers, though, are very well guarded and do not easily show their real self to others. Cancer moon people are even more emotional and sensitive then Cancer Sun people.
If I was in your place, I wouldn't try to change her...That "negativity" that you're sensing is not necessarily some thing bad (it sounds possible that her sun is in her 6th house)Perhaps you view it as negative because of your Moon. (and perhaps it is found in an "extreme" because all these planets in Cancer hit a remarkable conjunction)
I suggest that you try to accept her as she is..All people have pros and cons. It just happened that you're not able to see her cons as positive (yet). Perhaps it would be helpful if you reminded yourself that sensitive people have much more things to face and stay away from compared to those who are more level-headed. I'm sure it mustn't be that easy for her, either. I'm sure that she wants to do something about it (because she' s probably aware of the situation) but, she can't find the proper way (remember that Piscean Mars is not that direct when it comes to facing problems-it prefers to escape from them)
So when things between you don't go that well, keep in mind that BOTH of you are called to deal with it-it's just that you have different ways of doing so...
Good luck!