I need good comebacks and funny things to say?!

I need good comebacks and funny things to say?

i need some good comebacks not to naughty and things that will make people laugh like i dont know but funny things and random things to say plz help me

Try these:

1.You sound reasonable... Time to up the medication.

2.I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

3.You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

4.It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.

5.I can't believe that out of 10,000 sperm, you were the quickest.

6.The problem with the gene pool is that there's no lifeguard.