Grandchildren?!
Question:
Grandchildren?
Grandchildren
She was in the bathroom, putting on her makeup, under the watchful eyes of her
young granddaughter as she'd done many times before.
After she applied her lipstick and started to leave, the little one said,
"But Gramma, you forgot to kiss the toilet paper good-bye!"
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My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday.
He asked me how old I was, and I told him, "62."
He was quiet for a moment, then he asked, "Did you start at 1?"
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After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old slacks and
a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting
more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. Finally, she threw a towel
around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern
warnings. As she left the room, she heard the three-year-old say in a trembling voice:
"Who was THAT?"
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A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was like:
"We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a
tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods."
The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this all in. Then she said:
"I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"
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My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you
and God are alike?". Mentally polishing my halo I asked, "No, how are we alike?"
"You're both old."
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A little girl was diligently pounding away on her Grandfather's' word processor.
She told him she was writing a story. "What's it about?" he asked.
"I don't know," she replied. "I can't read."
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I didn't know if my grand daughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided to
test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was.
She would tell me and was always correct. It was fun for me, so I continued.
At last she headed for the door, saying sagely, "Grandma, I think you should try
to figure out some of these yourself!"
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When my grandson Billy and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the lights off
until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky insects. Still, a few fireflies
followed us in. Noticing them before I did, Billy whispered, "It's no use, Grandpa.
The mosquitoes are coming after us with flashlights."
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When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not sure.”
“Look in your underwear, Grandpa," he prompted, adding, "Mine says I'm four to six."
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A second grader came home from school and said to her Grandmother, "Grandma,
guess what? We learned how to make babies today."
The grandmother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool.
"That's interesting," she said, "how do you make babies?"
"It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change the 'y' to 'i’ and add 'es.' "
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Children's Logic: "Give me a sentence about a public servant," said a teacher.
One small boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant."
The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Do you know what pregnant means?"
she asked. "Sure," said the young boy confidently. "It means carrying a child."
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A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when
a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the truck was a Dalmatian dog.
The children started discussing the dog's duties. "They use him to keep crowds back,"
said one child. "No," said another, "he's just for good luck." A third child brought the
argument to a close: "They use the dogs to find the fire hydrants!"
Answers: My husband and I are howling with laughter. We especially like the one where the kids say who was that. Thanks for making our day. Now I've gotta go...I'm going to call the grandkids. Thanks, these are great.
From a grandma of 6, and # 7 on the way. :) I was playing with my nephew when he was 3, and then I had to stop playing because I had to go to work. He became very upset, and I tried to calm him down, explaining to him that I had to go to work.
"But why do you have to go to work," he asked.
"Because I need money," I said.
Jack then said, "Why do you need to go to work to get money? Just do like Mommy does and get it from the wall!" I didn't understand this, so I asked him what he meant. He said, "When Mommy needs money, we go to the bank and she gets money from the wall!!"
So apparently, according to Jack, if I need money then all I have to do is go to the ATM and get some! Those are SO freakin' cute! Very funny and I appreciated them. Thank you.