Funniest joke gets ten points!!?!


Question: hit me with your best shot just be clean and dont make any political or racial slams.


Answers: hit me with your best shot just be clean and dont make any political or racial slams.
I am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me and
we could all use a little more calmness in our lives. By following
the simple advice I heard on the Dr. Phil show, I have finally found
inner peace. Dr. Phil proclaimed, "The way to achieve inner peace is
to finish all the things you've started and never finished. "

So, looked around my house to see all the things I started and hadn't
finished, and before leaving the house this morning, I finished off a bottle of

Merlot, a bottle of White Zinfandel, a bottle of Bailey's
Irish Cream, a bottle of Kahlua, a package of Oreos, the remainder of
my old Prozac prescription, the rest of the cheesecake, some Doritos
and a box of chocolates. You have no idea how freaking good I feel.

Please pass this on to those you feel might be in need of inner peace!

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Some tips for retirement planning from an expert in the industry:



If you had purchased $1000.00 of Nortel stock three years ago, it would now be worth $49.00.

With Enron, you would have had $16.50 left of the original $1000.00.

With WorldCom, you would have less than $5.00 left.

With Global Crossing, you would have $0.00 left.

But if you had purchased $1000.00 worth of beer three years ago,
drank all the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum
recycling REFUND, you would have $614.00.

Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle.

It's called the 401-Keg Plan.
A blonde is talking to her friends, when one of them asks her why she has a tampon behind her ear?
The blonde says, 'chit! The where did I put my cigarette?


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