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Answers: there once was a guy who was retarded so he went to his computer and asked "what is the funniest joke you`ve ever heard" and then he died for being a dumass

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year 2000: Bush won the elections!!! Ja Ja Ja!!

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http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

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the cannibal got kicked out of the nursing home for eating all the vegetables

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What's the difference between jelly and jam?

I can't jelly my c&ck up your ***.

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A preacher was telling his congregation that anything they could think of, old or new, was discussed somewhere in the Bible and that the entirety of the human experience could be found there.

After the service, he was approached by a woman who said, "Preacher, I don't believe the Bible mentions PMS."

The preacher replied that he was sure it must be in there somewhere and that he would look for it.

The following week after service, the preacher called the woman aside and showed her a passage which read,

"And Mary rode Joseph's a*s all the way to Bethlehem."

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a man wanted to 3 wishes from a genie, 1 to be white 2 to be thin and 3 to pe surrounded by p**** (female private area). so the genie turned him into a tampon

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What's the difference between a rooster and a prostitute?
The rooster says,"Cockadoodle doo!" and the prostitute says, "Any kock will do!"

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3 mice sitting in a bar braggin about how tough they are.
first mouse: "I'm so tough, when I see a mousetrap, I don't run. I set it off with my foot then do bench presses with the bar!"
second mouse: "That's nothin'. When I see rat poison, I take some home with me, and mix it in with my coffee in the morning so I get a buzz."
They both look at the third mouse.
He just yawns and stretches and says, "I don't have time for this bullsh*t. I gotta get home and f*ck the cat."

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a man broke into a house and tied up the man and his wife he kisses the women on the cheek and runs to the bathroom, the husband whispers to his wife satisfy him love or he will kill us be brave and i love you, the wife replies he didn't kiss me he whispered I'm gay and horny where is the Vaseline now lets see you be ******* brave lol!!

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one old lady died when she was young

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why does bald people doesnt wear a hair net?


because they will look like a microphone.. hahaha

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lol its so lame:
what has a bottom at the top?



a leg!!!

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What did a wig say to another?

A: I'll curl up and even die (dye ) for you

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One of those joke i like....

Lemon Squeeze


There once was a religious young woman who went to Confession. Upon
entering the confessional, she said, "Forgive me, Father, for I have
sinned."

The priest said, "Confess your sins and be forgiven."

The young woman said, "Last night my boyfriend made mad,
passionate love to me seven times."

The priest thought long and hard and then said, "Squeeze seven lemons
into a glass and then drink the juice."

The young woman asked, "Will this cleanse me of my sins?"

The priest said, "No, but it will wipe that smile off of your face."

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