Another selection of blonde jokes, funny or not?!
Question: Eye Exam
The blonde sits down before the eye doctor explaining she's losing her sight. He sets up the eye chart, but she tells him she can't even see it.
"Well, he asks, "can you count the number of diplomas on the wall?"
"No," she responds, "too blurry."
So he unzips his fly and pulls out his pecker and asks, "can you see this?"
"Yes," she replies, "that's your penis!"
"I knew it," says the Doc, "you're cockeyed!"
51 Days
Five blonde women enter a bar and order a bottle of champagne and ten glasses from the bartender. They go and occupy a table, set a small framed picture in the middle, and start "high fiving" and dancing around the table chanting, "51 days! 51 days!".
A few minutes later, five more blondes enter the bar and join the others at the table. There is much laughing and merriment, alternating with the ritual chanting of "51 days! 51 days!".
Finally, the bartender can no longer control his curiosity and he strolls over to the table to see what is going on.
In the center is a picture of Cookie Monster in a frame. When the bartender asks what the celebration is all about, one of the women says, "We were all tired of the blonde jokes about how dumb we are, so we got together and put this puzzle together. On the package it said '2 to 4 years', but we all worked together and put the puzzle together in 51 days!"
Dodging Trees
A state trooper pulled a car over on a lonely back road and approached the blonde lady driver.
"Ma'am, is there a reason that you're weaving all over the road?"
The woman replied, "Oh officer, thank goodness you're here! I almost had an accident. I looked up and there was a tree right in front of me. I swerved to the left and there was another tree in front of me. I swerved to the right and there was another tree in front of me!"
Reaching through the side window to the rear-view mirror, the officer replied, "Ma'am, that's your air freshener."
Open Blouse
A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open, exposing one of her breasts.
A nearby policeman approaches her and remarks, "Ma'am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?"
"Why, officer?" asks the blonde.
"Because your blouse is open and your breast is exposed."
"Oh my goodness," exclaims the blonde, "I left my baby on the bus!"
Answers: Eye Exam
The blonde sits down before the eye doctor explaining she's losing her sight. He sets up the eye chart, but she tells him she can't even see it.
"Well, he asks, "can you count the number of diplomas on the wall?"
"No," she responds, "too blurry."
So he unzips his fly and pulls out his pecker and asks, "can you see this?"
"Yes," she replies, "that's your penis!"
"I knew it," says the Doc, "you're cockeyed!"
51 Days
Five blonde women enter a bar and order a bottle of champagne and ten glasses from the bartender. They go and occupy a table, set a small framed picture in the middle, and start "high fiving" and dancing around the table chanting, "51 days! 51 days!".
A few minutes later, five more blondes enter the bar and join the others at the table. There is much laughing and merriment, alternating with the ritual chanting of "51 days! 51 days!".
Finally, the bartender can no longer control his curiosity and he strolls over to the table to see what is going on.
In the center is a picture of Cookie Monster in a frame. When the bartender asks what the celebration is all about, one of the women says, "We were all tired of the blonde jokes about how dumb we are, so we got together and put this puzzle together. On the package it said '2 to 4 years', but we all worked together and put the puzzle together in 51 days!"
Dodging Trees
A state trooper pulled a car over on a lonely back road and approached the blonde lady driver.
"Ma'am, is there a reason that you're weaving all over the road?"
The woman replied, "Oh officer, thank goodness you're here! I almost had an accident. I looked up and there was a tree right in front of me. I swerved to the left and there was another tree in front of me. I swerved to the right and there was another tree in front of me!"
Reaching through the side window to the rear-view mirror, the officer replied, "Ma'am, that's your air freshener."
Open Blouse
A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open, exposing one of her breasts.
A nearby policeman approaches her and remarks, "Ma'am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?"
"Why, officer?" asks the blonde.
"Because your blouse is open and your breast is exposed."
"Oh my goodness," exclaims the blonde, "I left my baby on the bus!"
LOL You always make me laugh. thanks you are great at these jokes a * for you !!!!!=)
hahaha glad I am not blonde. Good jokes.
LOL your on a roll tonight!
Oh, thats cute.
But I'm blonde.
I don't act anything like that.
That's offensive.
But funny.
hahaha hilarious. i like the last one.
hahaa that hilarious
i really like all but the last one i think it could be a bit better did you make these up?
hahaha There is no stop in you today. Every joke you posted today was excellent.
pahahahaha funny!! but i dont get the 1st one XD
Thank god for you. I hate all these other blonde jokes that I've heard of but now I'm lmao. Thank you I was bored. Now I have jokes to tell people.
Lol at the last one, omg that was good. that was great. thanks for the laugh.
best-o-luck
heard em all still funny tho star4u
Well funny, nice one.
Good ones, lass. lol.