Lawyer xxx funny or not xxx?!


Question: A lawyer is conducting a defence of his client on a murder charge. The case is going well for him, the evidence is sketchy, what there is of it, and his client has the innocent look of a handsome young man.

Unfortunately, this lawyer never knows when to realise he is ahead, and likes the sound of his own voice a bit too much, he is also cocky and far too clever.

Nearing the end when his largely sympathetic listeners in the jury have already decided to return a not guilty verdict he says,

"And furthermore, I have learned in the last few minutes that no murder was committed, indeed, within ten seconds, you will see that the victim is in fact alive! He will walk through that door - " and with a dramatic gesture, indicates the main door of the courtroom.

All eyes of the jury, in fact the whole courtroom, including the startled (and none too pleased) judge, swivel in that direction and a tense silence ensues.

Of course, nothing happens and the lawyer, tickled to bits by his own cleverness says,

"Well, there you are ladies and gentlemen, so flimsy is this case, that all of you believed the victim was alive and well. On such sketchiness, lack of evidence and your own intuition, I leave it to you to decide the only verdict possible, that is, my client is not guilty." and smug as hell he sits down.

The jury retire and when they return the deliver a unanimous verdict - GUILTY!

The lawyer is aghast and furious, he runs after the foreman after the sentence is passed.

"Wait up! All of you were convinced he was innocent - after all, every one of you turned to look at the door!"

"Yes," said the foreman, "all of us were convinced he was innocent. But not everyone looked at the door. One of us was looking at the accused - and he WASN'T looking at the door!"


Answers: A lawyer is conducting a defence of his client on a murder charge. The case is going well for him, the evidence is sketchy, what there is of it, and his client has the innocent look of a handsome young man.

Unfortunately, this lawyer never knows when to realise he is ahead, and likes the sound of his own voice a bit too much, he is also cocky and far too clever.

Nearing the end when his largely sympathetic listeners in the jury have already decided to return a not guilty verdict he says,

"And furthermore, I have learned in the last few minutes that no murder was committed, indeed, within ten seconds, you will see that the victim is in fact alive! He will walk through that door - " and with a dramatic gesture, indicates the main door of the courtroom.

All eyes of the jury, in fact the whole courtroom, including the startled (and none too pleased) judge, swivel in that direction and a tense silence ensues.

Of course, nothing happens and the lawyer, tickled to bits by his own cleverness says,

"Well, there you are ladies and gentlemen, so flimsy is this case, that all of you believed the victim was alive and well. On such sketchiness, lack of evidence and your own intuition, I leave it to you to decide the only verdict possible, that is, my client is not guilty." and smug as hell he sits down.

The jury retire and when they return the deliver a unanimous verdict - GUILTY!

The lawyer is aghast and furious, he runs after the foreman after the sentence is passed.

"Wait up! All of you were convinced he was innocent - after all, every one of you turned to look at the door!"

"Yes," said the foreman, "all of us were convinced he was innocent. But not everyone looked at the door. One of us was looking at the accused - and he WASN'T looking at the door!"

serves him right, maybe he'll stop when he's winning
starred

Funny

I think its funny!

I still hate my sister

corny and too long

hahaha, funny

hahahhahaahahah. this was good. you made it up?

very good have a star

Very funny thanks for sharing. lol

Lawyer jokes are always good lol

Very funny

Good one!



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