The first person that makes me laugh... gets best awnser?!
Question: Not only must it make me laugh but it has to be the first one to make me laugh
Answers: Not only must it make me laugh but it has to be the first one to make me laugh
Two guys walking in the park one day spy a dog licking himself. One guys says" Gee I wish I could that"
The other asks "don't you think you should pet him first"?
wuddaya call a nun in a wheelchair virgin mobile haha laugh ok that didnt work
QUACK QUACK
ok um go lick ur balls ok i will
idk
im watchin u laugh or u die laugh or ill kill meself laugh or or or or or or or or or or QQQQQQQQQQQQUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAACCCCCKKKK...
Yeah, we were tuff back in high school, not like these kids today. I mean in physics class, the teacher ask a kid to prove the law of gravity. He threw the teacher out the window!
I mean in football games, after we sacked the quarterback, we went after his family.
have you heard the one about the man who had his whole left side amputated????
HE'S ALL RIGHT!!!!!
a little italian boy is at the zoo with his parents. his dad goes to the bathroom. he and his mom are looking at the elephant. the little boy asks "heya mamma, whats a that between the elephants legs?" mamma says, "why son, thats a the tail" little boy says "no, i mean the big a thing" mamma says "thats the trunk, son" little boy says, "no no no, the OTHER thing" and the mom finally replies "oh, thats a nothin'" then papa comes back and mamma has to go to the bathroom. the little boy says "hey a papa, whats a that between the elephants legs?", papa says "son, thats a just the tail" the little boy says "no, no, the big a thing" and papa says "you mean the a trunk, son" frustrated the little boys says "no the OTHER thing" papa says, "why do you ask?" "Cause mamma says its a nothin'" and papa replies, blushing "oh thats cause your mamma, shes a spoiled!!
After a long night of passion, the young guy rolled over, pulled out a cigarette from his jeans and searched for his lighter. Unable to find it, he asked the girl if she had one at hand.
"There might be some matches in the top drawer," she replied. He opened the drawer of the bedside table and found a box of matches sitting neatly on top of a framed picture of another man.
Naturally, the guy began to worry. "Is this your husband?" he inquired nervously. "No, silly," she replied, snuggling up to him.
"Your boyfriend then?" he asked. "No, not at all," she said, nibbling away at his ear.
"Well, who is he then?" demanded the bewildered guy. Calmly, Tony replied, "That's me before the operation."
or maybe this will
It has been a very long and tiring day for this bus driver as he just took his last load of kids from school.
As he is driving this kids home there is this little girl next to him who is jumping up and down practicing what she was taught in class, she goes like " If my mommy was a female dog and my daddy a male dog I will be a puppy." If my mommy was a female cat and my daddy a male cat I will be a kitten"
The little girl goes on and on making the bus driver to be very irritated and the bus driver thought of asking the little girl a question thinking that it will make her stop as she won't know the answer.
He asks "What if your mother was a prostitute and your father a gay?" The little girl stares at him thinking what the answer might be, and the teacher never taught her such a thing. The bus driver is happy that he finally managed to keep the little girl quite.
But the girl start jumping and shouting "I know! I know!" Then the man anxious to know "What is the answer? "
The girl look at him straight in the eye " I will be uhm... I will be a BUS DRIVER!"
k.. umm offically the gayiest question of my life. yay you!
Beer note!!
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A guy walks in a bar, and buys a huge beer. Then he sees someone he knows, and decides to go and say hi to them, but he does not want to drag his beer mug with him. So he sets it on a table, along with a note "I spit in this beer" hoping that no one will steal it then. Upon return, he sees another note saying "Me too!"
Drunkard
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A drunken man was wondering around the parking lot of a bar, bumping into every car and then rubbing the roofs of the cars. The manager comes out of the bar and stops the guy. "What the heck are you doing?" he asks the drunk.
"I'm looking for my car, and I can't find it."
"So how does feeling the roof help you?" He asked the drunk. "Well," the drunk replied. "MY car has two blue lights and a siren on the roof!!"
Back To China...
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Fu, Bu and Chu immigrated to the USA from China. They decided to become American citizens, and "Americanize" their names.
Bu, called himself "Buck."
Chu called himself "Chuck."
Fu decided to return to China.
Blame It On Snails!
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A couple throwing a dinner party ran out of snails. The wife told her husband to run down to the beach with a bucket and gather some snails. So, he took a bucket and went to the beach.
As he was collecting snails, he suddenly noticed a beautiful woman strolling along the beach. And just as he thinking of speaking to her, she came and stood near him. They got talking and she invited him to her place. They even ended up spending the night together.
At seven o'clock the next morning, he woke up and exclaimed: "Oh no! My wife's dinner party!" He gathered all his clothes, put them on real fast, grabbed his bucket, and ran out the door.
He ran down the beach to his apartment and in his hurry, dropped the bucket of snails at the top of the stairs. There were snails all down the stairs.
The door opened just then, with his angry wife standing in the doorway. He looked at the snails all down the steps, then at her, then back at the snails and said: "Come on guys, we're almost there!"
All i got to say is O.J. did it and he borrowed Michael's glove from the playground and used Lorrana Bobbitt's knife.