How to cook a turkey.?!
Question: 1. Go buy a turkey
2. Take a drink of whiskey (or scotch)
3. Put turkey in the oven
4. Take another 2 drinks of whiskey
5. Set the degree at 375 ovens
6. Take 3 more whiskeys of drink
7. Turn oven the on
8. Take 4 whisks of drinky
9. Turk the bastey
10. Whiskey another bottle of get
11. Stick a turkey in the thermometer
12. Glass yourself a pour of whiskey
13. Bake the whiskey for 4 hours
14. Take the oven out of the turkey
15. Take the oven out of the turkey
16. Floor the turkey up off of the pick
17. Turk the carvey
18. Get yourself another scottle of botch
19. Tet the sable and pour yourself a glass of turkey
20. Bless the saying, pass and eat out.
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Martha Stewart was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."
--------------------------------------...
He laid her on the table.
So white clean and bare.
His forehead wet with beads of sweat.
He rubbed her here and there.
He touched her neck and then her breast.
And then drooling felt her thigh.
The slit was wet and all was set,
He gave a joyous cry.
The hole was wide...
He looked inside.
All was dark and murky.
He rubbed his hands and stretched his arms...
And then he stuffed the turkey.
--------------------------------------...
November is when Americans close their eyes, bow their heads and give thanks for the turkeys they are about to receive ... Then they vote.
Answers: 1. Go buy a turkey
2. Take a drink of whiskey (or scotch)
3. Put turkey in the oven
4. Take another 2 drinks of whiskey
5. Set the degree at 375 ovens
6. Take 3 more whiskeys of drink
7. Turn oven the on
8. Take 4 whisks of drinky
9. Turk the bastey
10. Whiskey another bottle of get
11. Stick a turkey in the thermometer
12. Glass yourself a pour of whiskey
13. Bake the whiskey for 4 hours
14. Take the oven out of the turkey
15. Take the oven out of the turkey
16. Floor the turkey up off of the pick
17. Turk the carvey
18. Get yourself another scottle of botch
19. Tet the sable and pour yourself a glass of turkey
20. Bless the saying, pass and eat out.
--------------------------------------...
Martha Stewart was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."
--------------------------------------...
He laid her on the table.
So white clean and bare.
His forehead wet with beads of sweat.
He rubbed her here and there.
He touched her neck and then her breast.
And then drooling felt her thigh.
The slit was wet and all was set,
He gave a joyous cry.
The hole was wide...
He looked inside.
All was dark and murky.
He rubbed his hands and stretched his arms...
And then he stuffed the turkey.
--------------------------------------...
November is when Americans close their eyes, bow their heads and give thanks for the turkeys they are about to receive ... Then they vote.
The 1st one sounds good to me, the 2nd and 3rd made me chuckle, well done have a star.
Just what I needed to get me in the mood for the festive season. hahaha
I didn't know what to expect - but thanks for the laughs!!
LOL
10/10 and a star is on its way! *
the first one is so true - I can't tell you how many scottles of botch I go through every thanksgiving!
all of them are excellent especially last one!star for you!
Star for you,well done and thanks for sharing.
That is very funny. That's how I'm cooking my turkey this year.
Thanks: )
yam yammmmm whiskeyyyyyyyyyyhic haha *
The first one takes me back to my fondest memories of my uncle. LOL
very good
hehehe, pmsl hun, very good find
nice one
lol
Lmao this was hysterical, thx for sharing it....star
This is what makes Thanksgiving great, all the giving of yourself and time to make others laugh. Thanks. lol.
brilliant, simply brilliant
a star for your collection