Department store Santa and little Johnny?!
Question: As the Christmas season draws nigh, foretelling the end of over a full month of Commercial Christmas, there is a special urgency in the spirits of children as they visit toy stores and toy departments all over the country. It was with particular urgency that little Little Johnny dragged his mother to the toy department in a big department store. Mother quickly steered Little Johnny into the line of children waiting to talk to Santa, but Little Johnny was far more interested in the hobby horse. As soon as his mother relaxed her vigilance for a moment, Little Johnny vanished from the Santa Queue and began rocking back and forth on the hobby horse. His mother noticed his absence, and after a quick, frantic search, spotted him on the horse. She let him rock for a few minutes, then told him it was time to get off. Little Johnny ignored her. She began to beg; Little Johnny paid no attention. She began to make promises of sugarplums, etc., if only Little Johnny would get off the hobby horse. He stuck his nasty little tongue out at her. Then Santa himself, who had been watching this little family drama out of the corner of his eye, stepped over and said to Little Johnny's mother, "Perhaps I can persuade your son to cooperate." "I doubt that," said the mother, "but you're welcome to try." Santa, with a big smile, whispered quietly into Little Johnny's ear. Little Johnny's eyes grew very large, he quickly slid off the horse and took his mother's hand. Together, with no fuss, they left the store. As they drove home, Mama asked Little Johnny what Santa had whispered to him. Little Johnny was silent. Mama began offering bribes (toys and German Chocolate cake) if Little Johnny would only tell Mama what Santa's words were. Little Johnny turned pale and wouldn't utter a word. What had Santa said? Little Johnny's mother was determined to find out. She had never been able to get the kid to obey that easily, and decided it was worth a great deal of effort on her part to discover what magic Santa Claus had used on Little Johnny. She continued to bribe him with a soft voice and much cajolery, and Little Johnny's stubborn streak finally faded. What did Santa say? Little Johnny now answered "He said, 'Listen, you little son of a b*tch, if you don't climb your a*s the hell down off that horse right this second, I'm going to kick the living sh*t out of you!' "
Answers: As the Christmas season draws nigh, foretelling the end of over a full month of Commercial Christmas, there is a special urgency in the spirits of children as they visit toy stores and toy departments all over the country. It was with particular urgency that little Little Johnny dragged his mother to the toy department in a big department store. Mother quickly steered Little Johnny into the line of children waiting to talk to Santa, but Little Johnny was far more interested in the hobby horse. As soon as his mother relaxed her vigilance for a moment, Little Johnny vanished from the Santa Queue and began rocking back and forth on the hobby horse. His mother noticed his absence, and after a quick, frantic search, spotted him on the horse. She let him rock for a few minutes, then told him it was time to get off. Little Johnny ignored her. She began to beg; Little Johnny paid no attention. She began to make promises of sugarplums, etc., if only Little Johnny would get off the hobby horse. He stuck his nasty little tongue out at her. Then Santa himself, who had been watching this little family drama out of the corner of his eye, stepped over and said to Little Johnny's mother, "Perhaps I can persuade your son to cooperate." "I doubt that," said the mother, "but you're welcome to try." Santa, with a big smile, whispered quietly into Little Johnny's ear. Little Johnny's eyes grew very large, he quickly slid off the horse and took his mother's hand. Together, with no fuss, they left the store. As they drove home, Mama asked Little Johnny what Santa had whispered to him. Little Johnny was silent. Mama began offering bribes (toys and German Chocolate cake) if Little Johnny would only tell Mama what Santa's words were. Little Johnny turned pale and wouldn't utter a word. What had Santa said? Little Johnny's mother was determined to find out. She had never been able to get the kid to obey that easily, and decided it was worth a great deal of effort on her part to discover what magic Santa Claus had used on Little Johnny. She continued to bribe him with a soft voice and much cajolery, and Little Johnny's stubborn streak finally faded. What did Santa say? Little Johnny now answered "He said, 'Listen, you little son of a b*tch, if you don't climb your a*s the hell down off that horse right this second, I'm going to kick the living sh*t out of you!' "
Wasn't expecting that. Excellent.
not a nice santa.lol
Haha, that was so unexpected!
Star for you, thanks.
bad santa
oohhhh naughty santa, pmsl
star time
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
anothr nice one from you *
ahh that santa ,with his ever so convincing sweet words!!!
all that reading and at the end it wasnt even that funny, the joke dragged on a little, dont ya think?
way to go Santa, that wiped the smile off little Johnny, lol
star award