Post it here One of your favorite jokes of all time. Read mine...?!


Question: Yea I know I'm bored but I'm in a laughing mood so post a funny joke and get 10 points. Here's mine:


A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped prisoner, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"


Answers: Yea I know I'm bored but I'm in a laughing mood so post a funny joke and get 10 points. Here's mine:


A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped prisoner, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

Here's my fav:-

It's Colonel Smith's first day at a new base in Saudi Arabia, and the company clerk is showing him around the camp. They tour the entire base and the clerk shows him around and points out every building of interest. At the end of the tour, the Colonel says, "What about that little stable over there? What's that for?"

"Well," says the clerk, and looks at the ground in embarassment, "you may have noticed there aren't any women on the base. You see, we keep a camel in that there stable, so that when the men get their urges they can --"

The Colonel holds up his hand, shakes his head and cuts off the clerk midsentence. "PLEASE! Say no more. I get the point."

Well, as you can imagine, after a few weeks on the base the Colonel too felt the need for a woman, and so he found himself at the clerk's desk one Saturday afternoon. "Tell me," the Colonel said in a whisper, looking over his shoulder to be sure no one else could hear, "is the camel free this afternoon?"

The clerk checks his appointment book and nods in the affirmative. "How about I schedule you in for 2:00?"

The Colonel nods and walks away. At 2:00 he makes his way to the stable, walks in, and gently closes the door behind him. He finds a small stepping stool nearby, moves it behind the camel, and climbs onto it. Then he lowers his trousers, and begins, well, making love to the camel.

Just as he's nearing his peak, the door opens suddenly and the Colonel spins around in shock and embarrassment to see the clerk standing there with a big grin on his face. As the Colonel begins to yell for him to leave, the clerk interrupts him with a quizzical look on his face.

"Begging your pardon, sir, but wouldn't it have been simpler for you to just ride the camel into town to find a woman, like the other men do?"

very old joke

that was funny

a blonde and her father are walking on the sidewalk and her father says "look a dead bird" the blonde looks in the air and asks "where?"

This is my favourite....I don't think it's too offensive.

A guy whale & a girl whale are out on a date. As they're swimming around below the surface, a boat passes above them. "Holy crap!" says the guy whale "That's the whaling boat that killed my father when I was a young. Now is the time to exact some revenge. This is what we're going to do...we'll rise to the surface and go right underneath them and open up our blowholes. Between the two of us, there should be enough pressure to put a couple of holes in the boat and sink it." So the girl whale agrees to do it. They go up underneath the boat, blow open their blow holes and sure enough, they pop a couple of holes in the boat and the boat sinks. A few moments later, the guy whale looks up again and sees a whole bunch of the sailors swimming towards shore. "Holy crap, we didn't kill all of them. We're gonna have to go up there and chew them up and eat them, otherwise they'll get rescued and come after us in another boat. "

To which the girl whale replies "Look buddy, I agreed to the blow job, but there is no way I'm swallowing sea men."

Guy and his buddies all drinkin in a bar. The guy gets up walks over to the bartender and says hey buddy, I bet you $100 that I can place this beer mug 65 ft away at the other end of your bar piss in it and not spill a single drop. The bartender, knowing it's impossible says ok go ahead! So the guy sets up the glass 65 ft away climbs on the bar and pisses on the stools on the bar even on the bartender! The bartender knowing he won the bet laughed his a** off. Alright buddy pay up, ok says the guy and pays the bartender. Later the batender asks why did you make such a foolish bet? Guy says well, See my four buddies over there i bet them $100 a piece that I could piss on you and your bar and you would stand there and laugh about it!



The answer content post by the user, if contains the copyright content please contact us, we will immediately remove it.
Copyright © 2007 enter-qa.com -   Contact us

Entertainment Categories