I need jokes?!
Question: i need really funny jokes like somthin with lil johnny
Answers: i need really funny jokes like somthin with lil johnny
1.SUBSTITUTE TEACHER: Are you chewing gum?
LITTLE JOHNNY: No, I'm Little Johnny.
2.TEACHER: Johnny, how can one person make so many stupid mistakes in one day?
LITTLE JOHNNY: I get up early.
3.LITTLE JOHNNY: Dad, can you write in the dark?
FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write?
LITTLE JOHNNY: Your name on this report card.
4.A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks you're stupid, stand up!"
After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up.
The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?
"No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!"
5.Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face.
"Why do you do that, mommy?" he asked.
"To make myself beautiful," said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue.
"What's the matter?" asked Little Johnny. "Giving up?"
6)Visit to the Police Station
Little Johnny's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station they saw pictures, tacked to a bulletin board, of the 10 most wanted criminals.
One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. "Yes," said the policeman.
"The detectives want very badly to capture him."
Little Johnny asked, "Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture?"
7)Little John wa at school and the teacher asks "Let see Little john, if I say "I was rich, is past time, but if I say I'm beautiful What is it? Little John "Your imagination."
why is piglet always stinky?
cuz he always hangs around with poo(h)
Knock Knock
(Lil Johnny opens the door) "Who's there?"
Me... I kill You!!!!!!!
The suicide bomber proceeds in blowing lil Johnny up.
Lil Johnny protects himself by using Kenny.
But the Suicide bomber has two bombs.
Lil Johnny cuts the red wire, doesn't blow up, and everyone becomes friends.
THE END!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Hope that was punny) (phat+funny)
A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the bees.
"I don't want to know!" Little Johnny said, exploding and bursting into tears.
Confused, his father asked Little Johnny what was wrong. "Oh Pop," Johnny sobbed, "for me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. And if you're telling me now that grownups don’t really have sex, I've got nothing left to believe in!"
The teacher told her class the word of the day was "dictate" and who could spell it.
Johnnie raises his hand and he says d-i-k-t-a-t-e-.
Teacher says sorry that's wrong and calls on Betty.
Betty says d-i-c-k-t-a-t-e.
Sorry says the teacher, that's not right.
She calls on Darla and Darla says d-i-c-t-a-t-e.
Very good Darla, says the teacher, that's correct.
Now, says the teacher, who can use this word in a sentence?
Johnnie raises his hand I know-I know, he says.
OK says the teacher, please use the word Johnnie.
Johnnie says: How did my dictate last night, Darla?