What is the funniest joke you've heard?!


Question: I'm at work and just want to read something that will make me laugh..


Answers: I'm at work and just want to read something that will make me laugh..

After retiring, a man went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked him for his driver's license to verify his age. He looked in his pockets and realized he had left his wallet at home. He told the woman that he was very sorry, but he would have to go home and come back later.The woman said, "Unbutton your shirt." So he opened his shirt revealing his curly silver hair.She said, "That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me", and she processed his Social Security application.

When he got home, he excitedly told his wife about his experience at the Social Security office. She said, "You should have dropped your pants...you might have gotten disability, too."

How do you piss off a polloch?

Put him in a round room and tell him to piss in the corner.

wots a polloch???

=S

Why did the chef go to jail?

cuz he beat the eggs! hahaha

this is not the funniest joke i have ever heard just one i heard

A wife knew her husband was fooling around behind her back, cause she could taste her son on him.

what did the fish say when it swam into a walll?


dam

There was a zoo keeper, he had a monkey that died. The vistors loved the monkey and the profit it brought. So he decided to think fast and he had an idea. He bought a monkey suit and hired a man 500$ to wear the monkey suit and jump branch to branch for a day. The man agreed to. While the man was up on the tree he jumped branch to branch until he sliped and fell. He fell on his back and as he gets up he sees this tiger looking at him. The man cries " please don't eat me! i'm not a real monkey!" The tiger replies "shhhhhh! what are you trying to do? get us fired?".

haha...The tiger was also a custome.

Me-Have you ever seen the Biggest loser

Person- Yes im looking at him.

How do you know that the ' toothbrush ' was invented in Kentucky?
Cause if it had been invinted anywhere else it would have been called the 'teethbrush'.

I was buying a couple bags of dry dog food at a store and a lady in line asks, "Oh, do you have a doggy?"

"No ma'am, I'm on the Alpo diet. I keep these pellets in my pockets, and when I'm hungry i just munch on 'em. They're nutritious and filling, and the last time i went on it I lost 50 lbs. The only problem is I also ended up in intensive care in the Hospital."

"Oh my, were you poisoned?"

"No, I was sitting in the middle of the road licking my testicles and a car hit me."

Here's your sign.



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