Are these good for a stand up comedy competition?!
Question: Even if they were quoted, it's a local competition between classmates and friends, which aims for fund raising.. Enjoy a nice laugh hopefully while reading them =)
1. Why is is dangerous to do math in a jungle?
Because if you add four and four, you get ate!
2.Why do u put ban aids in the fridge?
For cold cuts!
3.Why did the man htrow his watch out the window?
he wanted to see time fly!!
4. what did thre flag say to the pole?
nothing, it just waved!
5. what did one eye say to the other?
something between us smells
6. where can u find divorce before marriage?
in the dictionary!!
7.what did one toilet say to another?
"you look a bit flushed"
8.what goes oh oh oh?
Santa walking backwards
9.what is the smartest U.S State?
Alabama- it has four As and 1 B!!
10. what's the best thing about numbers?
You can count on them!
and a joke..
Answers: Even if they were quoted, it's a local competition between classmates and friends, which aims for fund raising.. Enjoy a nice laugh hopefully while reading them =)
1. Why is is dangerous to do math in a jungle?
Because if you add four and four, you get ate!
2.Why do u put ban aids in the fridge?
For cold cuts!
3.Why did the man htrow his watch out the window?
he wanted to see time fly!!
4. what did thre flag say to the pole?
nothing, it just waved!
5. what did one eye say to the other?
something between us smells
6. where can u find divorce before marriage?
in the dictionary!!
7.what did one toilet say to another?
"you look a bit flushed"
8.what goes oh oh oh?
Santa walking backwards
9.what is the smartest U.S State?
Alabama- it has four As and 1 B!!
10. what's the best thing about numbers?
You can count on them!
and a joke..
you should start ith the joke to warm thing up
best of luck with it hope you have fun
PRETTY LAME MAN!
but its funny i guess.
quite humorous..
yeah, these are pretty funny. is their supposed to be a theme of sorts, b/c these are all kind of scattered jokes. but no matter what, it will make people laugh! and they are perfect for a fundraiser
i love that one about little johnny standing up !!!
laughing to myself at college.....oops lol
xxx
very funny but you should pick the easiest and the most funny and easy to remeber because they will be impressed if you dont need sheets
the additional details ...is cool one...you have to tell stories for a joke.....yes the 10 items were quite bore i say......
Here's one my son won a talent competition with.
"knock knock"
"who's there"
"I did a runnip"
"I did a runnip who?"
Say it quick and it works.
WOW! Allow me to applaud the new budding ‘stand-up comedian!'
Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha Ha Ha! Ha! I JUST CAN'T STOP LAUGHING!!! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha Ha Ha! Ha! Ha!
You deserve a star!!!
that is funny good stuff :)
Congratulations on getting a few giggles out of me.
Which is just what I needed this morning before I go to work, definite star for you.
Hopefully it all works out for you.
aww bless little johnny!
no3 always makes me chuckle!
:)
WELLLLLLLL they were different my son liked them so if you audience is like under 5 you'll be a smash otherwise I think you should work on it a bit more but hey good for you for trying and if thats your dream you go for it - Little Johnny got a giggle from me so your audience is broadening already
Lolz I like the last joke :P
Hi these jokes are not bad, but Im not sure if you will win. If you want to improve you jokes, the best book is; 'Comedy Writing Secrets', available from the internet book sellers. Hope that's useful.