Last one folks?!
Question: An old guy approaches the window of the movie theatre with a chicken on his shoulder, and asks for 2 tickets. The girl at the counter wants to know who is going in with him.
He replies, "Well, my pet chicken, of course!"
"I'm sorry," The girl tells him. "We can't allow animals in the theater."
The guy goes around the corner and stuffs the chicken into his pants. He returns to the window, buys his ticket and goes in. Inside the theater, the chicken starts to get hot and begins to squirm, so the man unzips his pants so the chicken can stick it's head out and watch the movie.
Seated next to him is a woman. She looks over at his lap and is horrified. She elbows her friend Myrtle and whispers, "Myrtle, this man over here has just unzipped his pants!"
Myrtle whispers back, "Oh, don't worry about it...you've seen one, you've seen them all."
Agnes says, "I know...but this one's eating my popcorn!"
Q. What does a coffin and a rubber have in common?
A. They both hold stiffs.
Q. What is the difference between a coffin and a rubber.
A. Ones coming and the other is going.
Two foreign immigrants have just arrived in the United States by boat and one says to the other, "I hear that the people of this country actually eat dogs." "Odd," her companion replies, "but if we shall live in America, we might as well do as the Americans do." Nodding emphatically, one of the immigrants points to a hot dog vendor and they both walk toward the cart. "Two dogs, please," she says. The vendor is only too pleased to oblige, wraps both hot dogs in foil and hands them over the counter. Excited, the companions hurry to a bench and begin to unwrap their "dogs." One of them opens the foil and begins to blush. Staring at it for a moment, she turns to her friend and whispers cautiously, "What part did you get?"
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Answers: An old guy approaches the window of the movie theatre with a chicken on his shoulder, and asks for 2 tickets. The girl at the counter wants to know who is going in with him.
He replies, "Well, my pet chicken, of course!"
"I'm sorry," The girl tells him. "We can't allow animals in the theater."
The guy goes around the corner and stuffs the chicken into his pants. He returns to the window, buys his ticket and goes in. Inside the theater, the chicken starts to get hot and begins to squirm, so the man unzips his pants so the chicken can stick it's head out and watch the movie.
Seated next to him is a woman. She looks over at his lap and is horrified. She elbows her friend Myrtle and whispers, "Myrtle, this man over here has just unzipped his pants!"
Myrtle whispers back, "Oh, don't worry about it...you've seen one, you've seen them all."
Agnes says, "I know...but this one's eating my popcorn!"
Q. What does a coffin and a rubber have in common?
A. They both hold stiffs.
Q. What is the difference between a coffin and a rubber.
A. Ones coming and the other is going.
Two foreign immigrants have just arrived in the United States by boat and one says to the other, "I hear that the people of this country actually eat dogs." "Odd," her companion replies, "but if we shall live in America, we might as well do as the Americans do." Nodding emphatically, one of the immigrants points to a hot dog vendor and they both walk toward the cart. "Two dogs, please," she says. The vendor is only too pleased to oblige, wraps both hot dogs in foil and hands them over the counter. Excited, the companions hurry to a bench and begin to unwrap their "dogs." One of them opens the foil and begins to blush. Staring at it for a moment, she turns to her friend and whispers cautiously, "What part did you get?"
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haha............1st one must've been you!!
starred!!
well.lol
lol that was funny! star!
lmao .. they are all good . thanks for making me laugh! i've had a really hard weekend.. =(
lol
lol =D
Hi Chris, All but one was funny especially the hot dog one.The coffin and the rubber and coming and going isn't one of your best. The chicken and the popcorn was great!!!
A Friend,
poppy1
funny
ha ha ha funny
thanks for a laugh
10/10
they all were just great................. thanks for a hearty laugh.
* 4 u.