A few short ones?!
Question: Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them,
'I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhea in the
convent.' 'Thank God,' said an elderly nun at the back. 'I'm so
tired of chardonay.
One day, a
man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very Sexy nightie.
'Tie me up,' she purred, 'and you can do anything you want.' So he
tied her up and went golfing.
A
woman came home, screeching her car into the driveway, and ran into the
house. She slammed the door and shouted at the top of her lungs, 'Honey,
pack your bags. I won the lottery!'
The husband said, 'Oh my
God! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain stuff?' 'Doesn't matter,'
she said. 'Just get out.'
Marriage is a
relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is a
husband.
A wife was making a
breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into
the kitchen. 'Careful,' he said, 'CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my
gosh! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW!
We need more butter. Oh my gosh! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER?
They're going to STICK! Careful. CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER
listen
to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up!
Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You
know you always forget to salt them. Use the! salt. USE THE SALT! THE
SALT!' The wife stared at him. 'What in the world is wrong with you? You
think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?' The husband calmly
replied, 'I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm
driving.'
Answers: Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them,
'I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhea in the
convent.' 'Thank God,' said an elderly nun at the back. 'I'm so
tired of chardonay.
One day, a
man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very Sexy nightie.
'Tie me up,' she purred, 'and you can do anything you want.' So he
tied her up and went golfing.
A
woman came home, screeching her car into the driveway, and ran into the
house. She slammed the door and shouted at the top of her lungs, 'Honey,
pack your bags. I won the lottery!'
The husband said, 'Oh my
God! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain stuff?' 'Doesn't matter,'
she said. 'Just get out.'
Marriage is a
relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is a
husband.
A wife was making a
breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into
the kitchen. 'Careful,' he said, 'CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my
gosh! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW!
We need more butter. Oh my gosh! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER?
They're going to STICK! Careful. CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER
listen
to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up!
Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You
know you always forget to salt them. Use the! salt. USE THE SALT! THE
SALT!' The wife stared at him. 'What in the world is wrong with you? You
think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?' The husband calmly
replied, 'I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm
driving.'
Ok I was going to say there were all funny.. but the last one..
LOL
OMG You made me laugh out loud!
BTW..where is my freaking Kangaroo.. I can't be expected to walk places :)
Cheers, I really like the egg-frying one.
hehehe :) backseat driver. star for you!
HAH
i like the second and 3rd
Ahahahaha, I love that last one.
Thanks, I needed a laugh <3
lol yeah nice one!!!!!!
omg! Those are hilarious! I loved the lottery one and the last one
I like the last one!
funny I like the one when the wife is cooking! classic
they were all funny!
lol, pretty good. pretty good indeed.
hahaha!
10/10
funny
Lmao i like the lottery one, pack up and get out lmao
Thanks
nice .lol
niice
The lottery one was my favorite. They were all good!
my favorite one was the lottery one. :) lol
They`re ace cheers ha ha ha ,,,,,,
lol
Liked them especially the last one.
Made me smile