A Few To Ponder on?!
Question: If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him - is he still wrong?
If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
Is there another word for synonym?
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice?"
When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be removed?
Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all?"
What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
How do they get the deer to cross at the road sign?
Why do they sterilise needles for lethal injections?
Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
Atheism is a non prophet organization.
If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
Never trust a stockbroker who's married to a travel agent.
Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
Is boneless chicken considered to be an invertebrate?
It must be true that men are from Mars. Look at how the place has deteriorated.
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
If psychics know the winning lottery numbers, why are they all still working?
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor since you can't drink and drive?
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
Why are there interstate hiways in Hawaii?
Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations, when smoking is prohibited there?
Do you need to use a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the morning?
If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?
If a cow lauged, would milk come out of her nose?
If nothing sticks to Teflon, how do they get Teflon to stick to the pan?
If you are in a vehicle travelling at the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?
Most packages say "open here"; What is the correct protocol to use if a package says "open somewhere else?"
Why are there braille instructions on drive-in Automatic Teller Machines?
Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?
Why do our noses run, and our feet smell?
Why is it when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?
Why do we play in recitals, and recite in plays?
You know that little indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they just make the whole plane out of the same substance?
Why are there floatation devices under airline seats instead of parachutes?
Why does Minute Rice require FIVE minutes to cook?
Why do we turn down the volume on our automobile radios when we are driving and trying to find an address?
Why do men refuse to stop and ask for directions, and women refuse to learn how to read maps?
Answers: If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him - is he still wrong?
If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
Is there another word for synonym?
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice?"
When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be removed?
Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all?"
What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
How do they get the deer to cross at the road sign?
Why do they sterilise needles for lethal injections?
Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
Atheism is a non prophet organization.
If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
Never trust a stockbroker who's married to a travel agent.
Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
Is boneless chicken considered to be an invertebrate?
It must be true that men are from Mars. Look at how the place has deteriorated.
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
If psychics know the winning lottery numbers, why are they all still working?
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor since you can't drink and drive?
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
Why are there interstate hiways in Hawaii?
Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations, when smoking is prohibited there?
Do you need to use a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the morning?
If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?
If a cow lauged, would milk come out of her nose?
If nothing sticks to Teflon, how do they get Teflon to stick to the pan?
If you are in a vehicle travelling at the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?
Most packages say "open here"; What is the correct protocol to use if a package says "open somewhere else?"
Why are there braille instructions on drive-in Automatic Teller Machines?
Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?
Why do our noses run, and our feet smell?
Why is it when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?
Why do we play in recitals, and recite in plays?
You know that little indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they just make the whole plane out of the same substance?
Why are there floatation devices under airline seats instead of parachutes?
Why does Minute Rice require FIVE minutes to cook?
Why do we turn down the volume on our automobile radios when we are driving and trying to find an address?
Why do men refuse to stop and ask for directions, and women refuse to learn how to read maps?
1) he could be talking to a man.
2) Not his hands, his mouth, so yes if he knows what he is saying
3) lol, No, but I'm still wondering if it is homoside or suicide...
4) "another word" but that's two words so there is no synonym for synonym.
5) Just the same as it is when people pratice a religion.
6) If the first one is not removed how wil you use the others?
7) The city.
8) Endangered plants are kept in special faciliies where they can't be eaten by ANY animal
9) I guess not...
10) Too bad for that "walk" huh
11) Same as if a man is removed from his torso. BTW all animals are naked...
12) Because they aren't 100% wool
13) Yup
14) Yeah, but u won't matter lol
15) yeah right lol
16) So they die from the right desiese I guess.
17) So they don't die b4 the impact and miss the target
18) lol. maybe they like funny tasting things.
19) cooked dough
20) razor, maybe he had a spear and used that.
21) Both are ture
22) lol, too drunk for # 4
23) true in only 1 way though
24) Well, im not gonna give you the whole lecture but I asked the same thing and it has something to do with the shifting of tectonic plates
25) Naughty Santa.....lol
26) 50% less friends now, awwww.
27) Too bad they don't have better tech.
28) ask McDonalds
29) It's beautiful for me......
30) So look for it.
31) because they're fake
32) For age i guess
33) the same reason why a lot of whords aren't
34) Why shouldn't there be?
35) because that's where it's been sold for years
36) It scilences the gun not the mime, why would you need to kill a mime?
37) In a car.
38) because the doors are made for 7-11 specially
39) cows drink water, only cubs drink milk
40) before it is cooked
41) You need to be energy to travel at the speed of light so you can have a car if it's not solid anymore
42) umm.. open somewhere else.
43) because they weren't made speciall for drive-in but for ATMs in general
44) The gov. needs more money from car crashes
45) because you're using "run" and "smell" and adjectaves to verbs
46) because a shipment is something small, like a phone, and cargo is something big, like a car.
47) you can also play in plays and recite in recitals
48) too expensive and too heavy, because its so heavy there would also be an increase in use of keroseine so more pollution
50) Just incase you land in water, air-planes can land saftely on land with a good pilot even if they were almost 50% damaged but on water it is very likely that you will sink and even if you have a parachute and you land in the water you will still drown
51) because it takes only minutes to cook not hours or half hours
52) to concentrate or to hear if anyone in the car finds it first and says "there it is"
53 and last) not all but lol, men are arrogant and women have a hard time "thinking" lol..... BTW i'm a man and I don't hesitate to stop and ask for directins if im lost, but my brother is an a** when it comes to asking poeple for help...
-------Sean
sorry for being logical, I couldn't help it
pretty good collection you've got there
thanks for sharing
I like the synonym one
`~`
Thsoe were pretty good, thank you
Really food for thouht :)
Gud ones
What an interesting life you have...lol
some of these were interesting and the santa one was hilarious. thanks for the interesting thoughts
Those are FUNNY. I like them, but the last isn't true. I'm perfectly able to read a map as are all the women in my family.
Yes! I do have those question too in my mind.
Any answer of those please? :D
Ha ha ha.!!!
Great list there Tony.!!!
10/10.!!!
Cheers.!!
really good list. keep them coming!!!
Psychics sometimes do win lotteries and to see the headlines just Google it… http://www.psychic-junkie.com/psychic-wi...