Who can say funniest joke?!
Question: Any one who say funniest joke and recieve lots of thumbs up will get the best answer! LOL
Answers: Any one who say funniest joke and recieve lots of thumbs up will get the best answer! LOL
A man and a woman are riding next to each other in first class on a plane. The woman sneezes, then takes a tissue and gently wipes it between her legs. The man isn't sure he saw what she did, and decides he is probably hallucinating.
A few minutes pass. The woman sneezes again. She takes a tissue and gently wipes it between her legs. The man is about to go nuts. He can't believe that he's seeing what he's seeing.
A few more minutes pass. The woman sneezes yet again. She takes a tissue and gently wipes it between her legs yet again.
The man has finally had all he can handle. He turns to the woman and says, “Three times you've sneezed, and three times you've taken a tissue and wiped it between your legs! What kind of signals are you sending me, or are you just trying to drive me crazy?”
The woman replies, “I am sorry to have disturbed you, sir. I have a rare condition such that when I sneeze, I have an orgasm.”
The man, now feeling badly, says, “Oh, I'm sorry. What are you taking for it?”
The woman looks at him and says, “Pepper.”
which way did he go?
A man meets a woman at a bar and they go to her place. They're undressing and he drops his trousers. She points to his messed up knees and asks what happened. He says 'when I was young I contracted kneesles'. She says 'you mean measles'. He says 'no, I actually got kneesles'. She shrugs and continues undressing. When he removes his socks she looks at his sorry toes and asks about them. He says 'shortly after the kneesles, I contracted toelio'. She says 'you mean polio?'. He says 'no, I got toelio'. She shrugs it off, until he drops his shorts. She looks again and says 'don't tell me - smallcox'.
whats the difference between an apple and an orange?
a bananna because a honda 50 has no windscreen!
ok ok im sausage
Doctor : I have some bad news and some very bad news.
Patient : Well, might as well give me the bad news first.
Doctor : The lab called with your test results. They said you have 24 hours to live.
Patient : 24 HOURS! Thats terrible!! WHAT could be WORSE? What's the very bad news?
Doctor : I've been trying to reach you since yesterday.
**************************************...
Patient: I always see spots before my eyes.
Doctor: Didn't the new glasses help?
Patient: Sure, now I see the spots much clearer.
FREE SPIRITS
A cannibal was walking through the jungle and came upon a restaurant operated by a fellow cannibal. Feeling somewhat hungry, he sat down and looked over the menu...
+ Tourist: $5
+ Broiled Missionary: $10.00
+ Fried Explorer: $15.00
+ Baked Democrat or Grilled Republican: $100.00
The cannibal called the waiter over and asked, 'Why such a price difference for the Politician?' The cook replied, "Have you ever tried to clean one? They're so full of s**t, it takes all morning."
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lol, i can say this as many times as u wish. .
Smallpox
A man meets a woman at a bar and they go to her place.
They're undressing and he drops his trousers. She points to his messed up knees and asks what happened. He says 'when I was young I contracted kneesles'. She says 'you mean measles'. He says 'no, I actually got kneesles'.
She shrugs and continues undressing. When he removes his socks she looks at his sorry toes and asks about them. He says 'shortly after the kneesles, I contracted toelio'. She says 'you mean polio?'. He says 'no, I got toelio'.
She shrugs it off, until he drops his shorts. She looks again and says 'don't tell me - small cox'.
a blonde gets locked in a supermarket that will never open up again but will not be bulldozed
how does she die