Few men jokes?!


Question: Q.What did God say after creating man?
A. I can do better.

Q. What do men and sperm have in common?
A. They both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human being.

Q. Why are blonde jokes so short?
A. So men can remember them.

Q. How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?
A. Both of them.

Q. Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
A. They don't stop and ask for directions.

Q. What should you give a man who has everything?
A. A woman to show him how to work it.

Q. What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
A .A dog only takes a couple of months to train.

Q. What do you call a man with half a brain?
A. Gifted.

just having a laught.


Answers: Q.What did God say after creating man?
A. I can do better.

Q. What do men and sperm have in common?
A. They both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human being.

Q. Why are blonde jokes so short?
A. So men can remember them.

Q. How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?
A. Both of them.

Q. Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
A. They don't stop and ask for directions.

Q. What should you give a man who has everything?
A. A woman to show him how to work it.

Q. What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
A .A dog only takes a couple of months to train.

Q. What do you call a man with half a brain?
A. Gifted.

just having a laught.

How many men does it take to open a beer?

- None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.

Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?

- Because a woman who can't afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.

Why do women have smaller feet than men?

- It allows them to stand closer to the sink.

How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?

- She starts her sentence with "A man once told me..."

How do you fix a woman's watch?

- It doesn't matter. There is a clock on the oven.

Why do men break wind more than women?

- Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the pressure.

If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?

- The dog. He'll shut up once you let him in.

What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?

- A woman that won't do what she's told.

I married Miss Right.

- I just didn't know her first name was Always.

I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months!

- I don't like to interrupt her.

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by up to 90%.

- It's called wedding cake.

Marriage is a three ring circus:

- Engagement ring, wedding ring, suffering.

My wife asked me "What's on the TV?"

- I said, "Dust!"

In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created Man and rested. Then God created Woman.

- Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.

Why do men die before their wives?

- They want to.

A man inserted an advertisement in the classifieds section with the heading "Wife Wanted."

- The next day he received a hundred letters saying "You can have mine."

you got the wrong word try changing the word man for the word BLONDE !!!
HE HE lol

Well done, thanks for the laugh

pretty funny

kinda funny

lol most is true about men just joking no offense guys well thx for the great laugh and that was nice of u to post up many jokes and not just one I WILL BE POSTING A FUN GAME QUESTION WHOEVER READS THIS PLS ANSWER THX

Oh, my God! Outrageously Funny!

Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha Ha Ha! Ha! I JUST CAN'T STOP LAUGHING!!! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha Ha Ha! Ha! Ha!

You deserve a star for these lovely joke Sweetie!!!

...........................................

Yer cheeky little monkey,me-thinks you know too much.!

has your boyfriend just finished with you or something

what do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes?

nothing, you already told her twice

i too am having a laught.

LOL!!!

LMAO
man theres some good ones there and some brilliant responces.

ha ha ha thanks keep them coming

Funny! 100!

hahahaha!!!
excellent lol
thanks for the laugh.

ha ha ha funny
thanks for a laugh



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