Who Here Has The Best Chuck Norris Quote?!


Question: 10 points for the best one!


Answers: 10 points for the best one!

Chuck Norris knows why men have nipples.

Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.

Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris.

Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete.

Me!! I do!!

"When Chuck Norris jumps into the water, he doesn't get wet. The water gets Chuck Norrised."

Hell yeah!!

chuck norris's tears can cure cancer... too bad he's never cried
There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip.
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

You know how Jesus is the right hand of God? Chuck Norris is the left...
Some people think Chuck Norris took steroids, that is not true... Steroids took Chuck Norris.

MacGyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips, but Chuck Norris can roundhouse-kick his head through a wall and take it.

When Chuck Norris says "More cowbell", he MEANS it.

Jesus walks on water; Chuck Norris walks on Jesus.
Kids wear Superman pajamas; Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
A rattlesnake bit Chuck Norris once, and after days of agonizing pain, the rattlesnake died.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity....twice.

'Is that Chuck Norris' daughter? No, it can't be. When Chuck Norris goes with a woman she explodes!'

My all time fav is "the dinosaurs only had to look at Chuck Norris wrong ONE TIME".

and followed closely by "Chuck Norris once had sex with a tractor... they now call that tractor Optimus Prime"

Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.

There are no such things as tornadoes.. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.

Chuck Norris doesnt read.. He just stares the book down until it gives him the information.

god i love these jokes.

Who would win a race around the world; The Flash or Superman?

Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris can drown a fish

Chuck Norris CAN believe its not butter

why doesnt Chuck Norris' balls have hair on them? Because hair doesnt grow on steel.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity...twice



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