Need a good laugh?!
Question: A bit sad today and need a good joke to cheer me up. Anyone got one.
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This is Mr. Bunny.
copy && paste him everywhere
you go so that he can achieve:
WORLD DOMINATION!!!
[muahahaha]
P.S. Don't let the bunny fool you.
Answers: A bit sad today and need a good joke to cheer me up. Anyone got one.
(\ /)
( . .)
C(")(")
This is Mr. Bunny.
copy && paste him everywhere
you go so that he can achieve:
WORLD DOMINATION!!!
[muahahaha]
P.S. Don't let the bunny fool you.
(\ /)
( . .)
C(")(")
The assistant asked the blond if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve. Six please" she said, I could never eat twelve.
A blond was walking down the road with a healthy looking pig under her arm. As she passed the bus stop, someone asked, Where did you get that? The pig replied, I won her in a raffle!
A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a new blond girl painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket. Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall. She showed him the instructions on the tin, For best results, put on two coats.
A blond asked someone what time it was, and they told her it was 4:45. The blond, with a puzzled look on her face replied, You know, it's the weirdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time I get a different answer.
A blond and a redhead went to the bar after work for a drink, and sat on stools watching the 6 O'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge, and the blond bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump. Sure enough, he jumped, so the blond gave the redhead $50. The redhead said, I can't take this, you're my friend. But the blond insisted saying, No. A bet's a bet. Then the redhead said Listen, I have to tell you that I saw this on the 5 O'clock news, so I can't take your money. The blond replied Well, so did I, but I didn't think he would jump again!
Three blond friends died together in a car wreck. They found themselves standing in front of the pearly gates with St. Peter. He told them that before they could enter heaven, they had to tell him what Easter was about. The first blond said, Easter is a big holiday where we give thanks, have a big feast and eat turkey. Nooooo, said St. Peter. You don't get in. The second blond said, Easter is the holiday that we celebrate Jesus' being born of the virgin and give gifts to each other. Nooooo, said St. Peter. You don't get in, either. The third blond said, Well, I know what Easter is all about. Easter is a Christian holiday which coincides with the Jewish Passover. After Jesus celebrated Passover with His disciples, He was betrayed by Judas and turned over to the Romans. They crucified Him on a cross. After He died, they buried him in a tomb and put a huge boulder in front of it. Very good! said St. Peter. The blond continued. Now, every year, the Jews roll the stone away and Jesus comes out. If He sees his shadow, we have 6 more weeks of basketball. St. Peter fainted!
On the first day of training for parachute jumping, a blond listened intently to the instructor. He told them to start preparing for landing when they are at 300 feet. The blond asked, How am I supposed to know when I'm at 300 feet? That's a good question. When you get to 300 feet, you can recognize the faces of people on the ground. After pondering his answer, she asked, What happens if there's no one there I know?
Two blonde's went to the pound where each adopted a puppy. The joy of their new best friend was quickly overshadowed when they got home and the first blond said, I think we're in trouble, how are we going to tell them apart? This lead to several hours of concentration until finally, the second blond said, I've got an idea. We'll tie a red bow around my puppy and a blue bow around yours. The next day the first blond comes running up to the second when she got home, Oh no, I can't tell whose puppy is whose... they've pulled the ribbons off while they were playing. OK, we need to find a better way to tell them apart, says the second blond After several more hours of concentration, they came up with the bright idea of getting different colored collars. Again, the next day, the first blond comes running up to the second as soon as she gets home, Oh no, I can't tell whose puppy is whose... they've pulled their collars off while they were playing. There's got to be some way to tell them apart, says the second blond After several more hours of concentration, the first blond finally comes up with another idea, I know! Why don't you take the black one and I'll take the white one!
A blond becomes a funeral arranger. So a mans father dies so he says I want the best for my father so the funeral comes and goes and the son could not go so he gets a bill for 90 dollars. Pays it next month another bill pays it same thing happens for 5 months. Then he calls the blond and asks what is this monthly 90 dollar charge and the blond says you wanted the best for your father so I rented him a suit.
a blond walks into a store and asks the clerk for the tv he says "no i don't sell to blonds"
the next day the blond comes back in a brunette wig and asks the same clerk for the tv again he says "no i don't sell to blonds"
the next day she comes backs to the same store in a redhead wig and asks the same clerk for the tv once again he says "no i don't sell to blonds"
confused the blond asks "how do you know i'm a blond?"
the clerk replies "that's not a tv that's a microwave"
a blond, brunette, and a redhead are stuck on an deserted island. there is another island that has peolple on it and the only way to get there is by swimming. the readhead swims 1/4 the way and drowns. the brunette swims 1/2 the way and drowns. the blonde swims all the way across to the other island says "i'm tired" and swims all the way back.
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are stuck on an island. And for years and years they lived there, one day they find a magic lamp. They rub and rub and sure enough out comes a genie. The genie says, Since I can only give out 3 wishes, you may each have one. So the brunette goes first, I have been stuck here for years, I miss my family and my husband and my life. I wish I was home.", and POOF she is gone. The redhead makes her wish, This place stinks, I wish I was home with my family also., and POOF she is gone. The blonde starts crying uncontrollably. The genie says to her, My dear what is the matter? The blonde replies, I wish my friends were here.
A blonde gets on an airplane and sits down in the first class section. The stewardess tells her she must move to coach because she doesn't have a first class ticket. The blonde replies, I'm blonde, I'm smart, and I have a good job and I'm staying in first class until we reach Jamaica. The stewardess gets the head stewardess who asks the woman to leave and she says I'm blonde, I'm smart, I have a good job and I'm staying in first class until we reach Jamaica. The stewardesses don't know what to do because they have to get the rest of the passengers seated to take off, so they get the co-pilot. The co-pilot goes up to the blonde and tells her. She immediately gets up and goes to her seat in the coach section. The head stewardess asks the co-pilot what he said to get her to move. The co-pilot replies, I told her the front half of the airplane wasn't going to Jamaica 5
a blond walks into a salon wearing headphones the owner says take off the headphones the blond says no comes back the next day same thing happens comes back the next day and she says she will take them off she sits in the chair and the owner goes to get someone to do her hair when he comes back the blond is dead he listens to the headphones and hears breath in breath out.
Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away... Florida or the moon?" The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly. She says, "What's the story?" He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor" She asks, "How often do I have to do that?" A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!" There's this blonde out for a walk. She come s to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "How can I get to the other side?" back, "You ARE on the other side."
A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it. "Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me." The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She pushed her knee and screamed likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed Everywhere she touched made her scream The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are you? Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is broken. A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down hi s window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER! NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF. Hey if I poke my computer will you laugh.
so my dad came up to me and said"son if you masturbate too much you will go blind"and i was like,"uhh dad,am over here"
nice bunny!
oh youl bunny is cho cute......
joke
this one in a hindi joke,
A teacher told a boy,that "Sunil,tomorrow,you have to learn new words and come to school,i will take your test."
When the boy reaches home,he goes to his dad,thinking that he could ask him for some new words,meanwhile his dad was watching criket,and before the boy could ask n.e.thing,his dad said,"beta sachin is zero!"
So the boy takes us "zero" in his mind.
then he goes to his mother,she is working in the kitchen,and before listening to him she says"Bahot sare mehman aane wale hain - shut up" so he takes "shut up"in his mind....
then he goes to his sister,his sister has been speaking to her bf on the phone - the bf asks - can we go on to a date today?
And his sister replies - "aaj nahi darling kal chalenge"
so he takes up this whole line in his mind
the next day at school
The teacher asks - Sunil - how many new words did you learn?
so he says - zero
teacher says - what?
sunil - shut up
teacher - come with me to the principle's office.
sunil - aaj nahi darling,kal chalenge!!!!
a Blonde man passes a local prison and sees a WANTED poster for a blonde robber. So he goes in and apply's for the job.
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ok here are some jokes
A young female teacher was giving an assignment to her Grade 6 class one day. It was a large assignment so she started writing high up on the chalkboard. Suddenly there was a giggle from one of the boys in the class.
She quickly turned and asked, "What's so funny Pat?"
"Well teacher, I just saw one of your garters."
"Get out of my classroom," she yells, "I don't want to see you for three days."
The teacher turns back to the chalkboard. Realizing she had forgotten to title the assignment; she reaches to the very top of the chalkboard. Suddenly there is an even louder giggle from another male student. She quickly turns and asks, "What's so funny Billy?"
"Well miss, I just saw both of your garters."
Again she yells, "Get out of my classroom!" This time the punishment is more severe "I don't want to see you for three weeks."
Embarrassed and frustrated, she drops the eraser when she turns around again. So she bends over to pick it up. This time there is an burst of laughter from another male student. She quickly turns to see Little Johnny leaving the classroom.
"Where do you think you are going?" she asks.
"Well teacher, from what I just saw, my school days are over."
Preside
that is a funny joke
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Ok this guy went to the doctor for a checkup and the doctor says " you need to stop masturbating." "why?" the guy says "cause I'm trying examine you."
nice
one day three men go to a hotel and a person said " if you jump into this pool and when you jump say the thing you want to land in and you will land in the thing you want" so one person can not eat meat and he said "bannanas" and he lands in bannanas then the next guy said money and he lands in money then the third person jumps and right when he jumps a bird takes a dump on him and he falls and he said **** so he lands in ****
=)
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That's not a bunny. That's the Pillsbury Doughboy. :D
wow i got nothing