What are some of the funniest quotes who've ever heard or seen?!
Question: don't drop the soap - random people
* my friends * : friend 1 : what's stopping me from shanking you right now?
friend 2 : um.....ur religion
friend 1 : Nope! Shank now. Repent Later!
* my friends * friend : ur on my list .....B@*&% ! * eats chip for dramatic effect!
Some lady acting out at McDonalds in Florida
Cashier : can i help u ?
Lady : i would like a cripsy chicken burger. * don't know why she called it burger*
Cashier : i'm sorry were out of chicken at the moment.
Lady : What!!!! how r u not gonna have chicken! what about people who want a chicken burger!!!!!!??I'm HUNGRY darnit!
Whopper Freakout : Guy : now i have to go make a peanut butter and jelly sandwhich in this b*&#@!!
Yep my all time fav quotes!
Answers: don't drop the soap - random people
* my friends * : friend 1 : what's stopping me from shanking you right now?
friend 2 : um.....ur religion
friend 1 : Nope! Shank now. Repent Later!
* my friends * friend : ur on my list .....B@*&% ! * eats chip for dramatic effect!
Some lady acting out at McDonalds in Florida
Cashier : can i help u ?
Lady : i would like a cripsy chicken burger. * don't know why she called it burger*
Cashier : i'm sorry were out of chicken at the moment.
Lady : What!!!! how r u not gonna have chicken! what about people who want a chicken burger!!!!!!??I'm HUNGRY darnit!
Whopper Freakout : Guy : now i have to go make a peanut butter and jelly sandwhich in this b*&#@!!
Yep my all time fav quotes!
"I have a lovely bauch of coconuts" and a joke with 3 brothers named, fuc.k you, shi.t, and you( thats his name).
One day shi.t fall out of the window. So fuc.k you called the police;
Police: Hello what is your emergancy?
Fuc.k you:Shi.t fell out of the window and you went 2 pick him up
Police:what is your name sir?
Fuc.k you: Fuc.k you sir
Police: what?
Fuc.k you: Fuc.k you so can u help me pick up shi.t?
And then the police hanged up.
THE END!!
"Put that in your pipe and smoke it" - me
guy 1: im so bored i can kiss a guy
guy 2: *cough* kiss me! *cough*
student: looks at work and says "what the hell is this man!!!!"
Teacher: thats the same thing your mom said the day you were born!"
History class:
Teacher: I'm going to Egypt for the holidays! ^^
Student: Would you please bring me a cammel?
Teacher: Why, you looking for a date?
English class:
Teacher: Did Gatzby actually go to Oxford?
Student 1: He went to the Oxford in Africa!
Teacher: I don't know where that is...
Student 2: Monte *****!?
Student 1: No, Monte ***** is in Albania
and again
Teacher: What does Holden see when he looks in the mirror after the fight?
Student: Himself!
etc...
Dont lose your detention slip and tell the teacher you rolled it up and smoked it. You'll get 3 more detentions. trust me, i know.
put that in ure juicebox and suck it!- friend!!
A Replubican stands up in Congress and says, "I've got a really bad idea." And a Democrat immediately jumps to his feet and declares, "And I'm gonna make it shittier."
It's a quote by my favorite stand up comedian, Lewis Black. To find more quotes by Lew, you can go to http://hubpages.com/hub/lewisblack
"chemestry is a class u take where u learn that 2+3=10 or something like that."
- some famous sports guy. I forgot who