Need funny joke!!!!!!!!?!
Question: Does any one know any funny jokes?
Answers: Does any one know any funny jokes?
"how to tell you're 2 drunk 2 drive"
When you swerve to miss a tree and soon realize the tree was actually your airfreshener.
riddle me this:
10 pears hanging high, 10 men came passing by;
Each took a pear and left 9 hanging there
How can this be?
answer: Each is his name
good one dolphin
George Bush visits a primary school and sits in on one of the classes, which is in the middle of a discussion of words and their meaning. The teacher asks Mr. Bush if he would like to lead the discussion of the word "tragedy." So, the illustrious president asks the class for an example of a "tragedy."
One little boy stands up and offers: "If my best friend, who lives on a farm, is playing in the field and a runaway tractor comes along and knocks him dead, that would be a tragedy." "That's wrong," Bush shouts. "That would be considered an accident."
A little girl raises her hand: "If a school bus carrying 50 children drove over a cliff, killing everyone inside, that would be a tragedy."
"You are completely incorrect," shouts the senator. "That would be what we would consider a great loss."
The room goes silent. No other children volunteer.
Bush searches the room. "Isn't there ! someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?"
Finally, at the back of the room, a small boy raises his hand. In a quiet voice, he says, "If a plane carrying George Bush were struck by a missile and blown to smithereens, that would be a tragedy."
"Fantastic!" exclaims Bush. "You are absolutely right. Can you tell me why that would be a tragedy?"
"Well," says the boy, "because it sure as hell wouldn't be a great loss, and it probably wouldn't be an accident!"
Marys Father has 5 daughters, Nana, Nene, Nini, and Nono, whats the name of the fifth daughter?
Mary.
How do you put a stupid person in suspense?
Figure it out on your own.
An elderly couple had been dating each other for 30 years and, at the urging of their friends and family, the finally decided it was time to get married. But first, they agreed they should work out the details of how their marriage was going to be, as to avoid any let downs or misunderstandings.
So the older couple went out to a nice dinner and had a long conversation about how their marriage is going to work. They discussed living arrangements, finances and other important stuff. Finally, the older gentleman decided it was time to bring up the subject of their physical relationship.
“How do you feel about sex?” he asked, rather trustingly yet intrigued.
“Well,” she said, trying to choose her words carefully, “I’d have to say… I would like it infrequently.”
The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment, then over his glasses, he looked her in the eye and casually asked… “Is that one word or two?”
that's a riddle dolphin..