I need joke?!
Question: jew jokes
how do you get 100 jews into a car put a quarter in it
have you heard of a jewish sports car it stops on a dime and picks it up
Answers: jew jokes
how do you get 100 jews into a car put a quarter in it
have you heard of a jewish sports car it stops on a dime and picks it up
HAHAHAHHAHAH!
QUARTER!!! LOL
i have no idea
It's a stupid Q!
Get a life, loser
enough with the narrow minded insults
what do you get when a fat lady tried to swim
tatantic
STUPID GET A LIFE
Teacher :What happened in 1869?
Student:Gandhi ji was born.
Teacher :What happened in 1873?
Student:Gandhiji was four years old.
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Teacher :Ramya and Shilpa!,why are you late for school,today?
Shilpa:Madam, I lost a one rupee coin and was searching for it.
Teachear:Ramya, what about you?
Ramya:Madam. .., I was not able to move ....because I was hiding that coin under my feet.
------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- -------- Question: What is the fullform of maths.
Anwser:Mentaly affected teachers harrasing students
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Teacher : Now children , if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him then what virtue would I be showing ?
Student : BROTHERLY LOVE
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Teacher :Because of Gandhiji's hard work what do we get on 15th August.
Student:A holiday
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Which is the pan in which we cannot fry something?.. ....
Japan
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Teacher :Tomorrow there will be a lecture on Sun.Everyone must attend it.
Raju:No ma'm! I will not be able to attend it.
Teacher :Why?
Raju:My mother will not allow me to go so far!!!
------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------- Teacher: "Can anyone give me an example of Coincidence? "
Johnny:"Sir, my mother and father got married on the same day same time."
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Teacher: How old is ur father.
Sunny:As old as I am.
Teacher:How is it possible?
Sunny:He became father only after I was born.
------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- -------- Teacher: There is a frog,Ship is sinking,potatoes cost Rs 3/kg .Then,what is my age?
STUDENT:32 yrs.
Teacher:How do you know?
STUDENT:Well, my sister is 16 yrs old and she is half mad.
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Student:(to teacher)Ma'am my pen has run out of ink.
Teacher:Go run after it.
------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- ------------ --------- --------- -------- Teacher: Ramu,get up.How can you sleep in my class?
Ramu:I can teacher,if you keep your voice down.
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Teacher: Where does God live?
Little boy: I think he lives in our bathroom.
Teacher: Why do you say that?
Little boy: Well, every morning my daddy bangs on the door and says, 'God, are you still in there?'
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Teacher:"What is your name?".
Student:"Mera naam Surya Prakash hai."
Teacher:"When I ask aquestion in english, answer it in english."
Student:"My name is Sunlight."
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kEEP SMILING
Farmer Joe decided his injuries from his recent accident were serious enough to take the trucking company responsible for the accident to court. In court, the trucking company's fancy lawyer was questioning farmer Joe.
"Didn't you say, at the scene of the accident, that you were fine?"
''Well, I'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favorite mule Bessie into the--"
''I didn't ask for any details,'' the lawyer interrupted. ''Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, that you were fine?"
''Well I had just got Bessie into the trailer and was driving down the road--''
''Judge, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the Highway Patrolman on the scene that he was just fine. Now several weeks after the accident he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question.''
By this time the Judge was fairly interested in Farmer Joe's answer and told the lawyer so.
''Well," said the farmer, "as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my favorite mule, into the trailer and was driving her down the highway when this huge semi-truck and trailer ran the stop sign and smacked my truck right in the side. I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other. I was hurting real bad and didn't want to move. However, I could hear ol' Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in terrible shape just by her groans."
"Shortly after the accident a Highway Patrolman came on the scene. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he went over to her. After he looked at her he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes. Then the Patrolman came across the road with his gun in his hand and looked at me. He said, 'Your mule was in such bad shape I had to shoot her. How are you feeling?'"
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Things Yoda Says Before, During, and After Sex:
"Ahhh! It's Yoda's little friend you seek!"
"Feel the force flowing through you!"
"Foreplay, cuddling: a Jedi craves not these things."
"When 900 years old you get, Viagra you need too, hmmmmm?"
"Mmrrrmm. Put a shield on my sabre, I must."
"Who's the Jedi Master! Who's the Jedi Master!"
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A man takes his wife to a livestock show. They start heading down the alley where the bulls are kept. A sign in front of the first bull says: "This bull mated 50 times last year."
The wife turns to her husband and says, "He mated 50 times in a year! You could learn from him."
They proceed to the next bull and that sign states: "This bull mated 65 times last year."
The wife turns to her husband and says, "This one mated 65 times last year. That's over 5 times a month. You can learn from this one, big time."
They proceed to the last bull and his sign reads: "This bull mated 365 times last year."
The wife's mouth drops open as she gasps, "WOW! He mated 365 times last year. That's ONCE A DAY! You could really learn from this one!"
The man turns to his wife and says, "Yeah, okay. Go on up and inquire if it was 365 times with the same cow."
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An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen. The two elderly gentlemen were talking, and one said, "Last night we went out to a new restaurant, and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly." The other man said, "What is the name of the restaurant?"
The first man thought and thought and finally said, "What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know... the one that is red and has thorns."
"Do you mean a rose?"
"Yes," the man said. He turned toward the kitchen and yelled, "Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?"
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A schoolteacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his body. It fit under his shirt and was not noticeable at all.
On the first day of the term, still with the cast under his shirt, he found himself assigned to the toughest students in school.
Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, he opened the window as wide as possible and then busied himself with deskwork. When a strong breeze made his tie flap, he took the desk stapler and stapled the tie to his chest.
He had no discipline problems with any of his students that term.
If you like it, 10 points please