Do you fart in bed?!
Question: Do you fart in bed!?
If you find your self laughing as a result of this story, please give me a star!.!.!.
THIS IS A STORY ABOUT A COUPLE WHO HAD BEEN HAPPILY MARRIED FOR YEARS!. THE ONLY FRICTION IN THEIR MARRIAGE WAS THE HUSBAND'S HABIT OF FARTING LOUDLY EVERY MORNING WHEN HE AWOKE!. THE NOISE WOULD WAKE HIS WIFE AND THE SMELL WOULD MAKE HER EYES WATER AND MAKE HER GASP FOR AIR!.
EVERY MORNING SHE WOULD PLEAD WITH HIM TO STOP RIPPING THEM OFF BECAUSE IT WAS MAKING HER SICK!. HE TOLD HER HE COULDN'T STOP IT AND THAT IT WAS PERFECTLY NATURAL!. SHE TOLD HIM TO SEE A DOCTOR , SHE WAS CONCERNED THAT ONE DAY HE WOULD BLOW HIS GUTS OUT!.
THE YEARS WENT BY AND HE CONTINUED TO RIP THEM OUT!. THEN ONE THANKSGIVING MORNING AS SHE WAS PREPARING THE TURKEY FOR DINNER AND HE WAS UPSTAIRS SOUND ASLEEP, SHE LOOKED AT THE INNARDS AND NECK, GIZZARD, LIVER AND ALL THE SPARE PARTS AND A MALICIOUS THOUGHT CAME TO HER!.
SHE TOOK THE BOWL AND WENT UPSTAIRS WHERE HER HUSBAND WAS SOUND ASLEEP AND, GENTLY PULLING THE BED COVERS BACK, SHE PULLED BACK THE ELASTIC WAISTBAND OF HIS UNDERPANTS AND EMPTIED THE BOWL OF TURKEY GUTS INTO HIS SHORTS!.
SOME TIME LATER SHE HEARD HER HUSBAND WAKEN WITH HIS USUAL TRUMPETING WHICH WAS FOLLOWED BY A BLOOD CURDLING SCREAM AND THEN THE SOUND OF FRANTIC FOOT STEPS AS HE RAN INTO THE BATHROOM!.
THE WIFE COULD HARDLY CONTROL HERSELF AS SHE ROLLED ON THE FLOOR LAUGHING, TEARS IN HER EYES! AFTER YEARS OF TORTURE SHE RECKONED SHE HAD GOT HIM BACK PRETTY GOOD!.
ABOUT TWENTY MINUTES LATER, HER HUSBAND CAME DOWSTAIRS IN HIS BLOODSTAINED UNDERPANTS WITH A LOOK OF HORROR ON HIS FACE!. SHE BIT HER LIP AS SHE ASKED HIM WHAT WAS THE MATTER!.
HE SAID, 'HONEY YOU WERE RIGHT!.' 'ALL THESE YEARS YOU HAVE WARNED ME AND I DIDN'T LISTEN TO YOU'!.
'WHAT DO YOU MEAN!?' ASKED HIS WIFE!.
'WELL, YOU ALWAYS TOLD ME THAT ONE DAY I WOULD END UP FARTING MY GUTS OUT, AND TODAY IT FINALLY HAPPENED!.'
BUT BY THE GRACE OF GOD, WITH SOME VASELINE AND TWO FINGERS!. I THINK I GOT MOST OF THEM BACK IN!.'Www@Enter-QA@Com
THIS IS A STORY ABOUT A COUPLE WHO HAD BEEN HAPPILY MARRIED FOR YEARS!. THE ONLY FRICTION IN THEIR MARRIAGE WAS THE HUSBAND'S HABIT OF FARTING LOUDLY EVERY MORNING WHEN HE AWOKE!. THE NOISE WOULD WAKE HIS WIFE AND THE SMELL WOULD MAKE HER EYES WATER AND MAKE HER GASP FOR AIR!.
EVERY MORNING SHE WOULD PLEAD WITH HIM TO STOP RIPPING THEM OFF BECAUSE IT WAS MAKING HER SICK!. HE TOLD HER HE COULDN'T STOP IT AND THAT IT WAS PERFECTLY NATURAL!. SHE TOLD HIM TO SEE A DOCTOR , SHE WAS CONCERNED THAT ONE DAY HE WOULD BLOW HIS GUTS OUT!.
THE YEARS WENT BY AND HE CONTINUED TO RIP THEM OUT!. THEN ONE THANKSGIVING MORNING AS SHE WAS PREPARING THE TURKEY FOR DINNER AND HE WAS UPSTAIRS SOUND ASLEEP, SHE LOOKED AT THE INNARDS AND NECK, GIZZARD, LIVER AND ALL THE SPARE PARTS AND A MALICIOUS THOUGHT CAME TO HER!.
SHE TOOK THE BOWL AND WENT UPSTAIRS WHERE HER HUSBAND WAS SOUND ASLEEP AND, GENTLY PULLING THE BED COVERS BACK, SHE PULLED BACK THE ELASTIC WAISTBAND OF HIS UNDERPANTS AND EMPTIED THE BOWL OF TURKEY GUTS INTO HIS SHORTS!.
SOME TIME LATER SHE HEARD HER HUSBAND WAKEN WITH HIS USUAL TRUMPETING WHICH WAS FOLLOWED BY A BLOOD CURDLING SCREAM AND THEN THE SOUND OF FRANTIC FOOT STEPS AS HE RAN INTO THE BATHROOM!.
THE WIFE COULD HARDLY CONTROL HERSELF AS SHE ROLLED ON THE FLOOR LAUGHING, TEARS IN HER EYES! AFTER YEARS OF TORTURE SHE RECKONED SHE HAD GOT HIM BACK PRETTY GOOD!.
ABOUT TWENTY MINUTES LATER, HER HUSBAND CAME DOWSTAIRS IN HIS BLOODSTAINED UNDERPANTS WITH A LOOK OF HORROR ON HIS FACE!. SHE BIT HER LIP AS SHE ASKED HIM WHAT WAS THE MATTER!.
HE SAID, 'HONEY YOU WERE RIGHT!.' 'ALL THESE YEARS YOU HAVE WARNED ME AND I DIDN'T LISTEN TO YOU'!.
'WHAT DO YOU MEAN!?' ASKED HIS WIFE!.
'WELL, YOU ALWAYS TOLD ME THAT ONE DAY I WOULD END UP FARTING MY GUTS OUT, AND TODAY IT FINALLY HAPPENED!.'
BUT BY THE GRACE OF GOD, WITH SOME VASELINE AND TWO FINGERS!. I THINK I GOT MOST OF THEM BACK IN!.'Www@Enter-QA@Com
Answers:
Ok Clara you get your STARs ! ! ! HERE YOU ARE
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i wonder if he'll notice them in a few hours, when he uses the toilet for a #2 - will he scoop them out and run them to the E!.R!.!?
the guy is an idiot, the guts were completely detached, and he's how old and has never seen raw turkey guts!?Www@Enter-QA@Com
the guy is an idiot, the guts were completely detached, and he's how old and has never seen raw turkey guts!?Www@Enter-QA@Com
i just just about to answer yes i do fart in bed until i seen your essay and i cannnt be bothered to read all that mate so sorry!Www@Enter-QA@Com
EEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWww@Enter-QA@Com
yeah somtimesWww@Enter-QA@Com
LOL very funnyWww@Enter-QA@Com
Very goodWww@Enter-QA@Com
LMAO He pushed turkey gutts back in, LMAO EEEwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwWww@Enter-QA@Com
UNGH!!!!!!! That is so gross~~Www@Enter-QA@Com
LOL!. Yep, you got me with that one!Www@Enter-QA@Com
LOLWww@Enter-QA@Com
lolzX! dat waz very funny! =DWww@Enter-QA@Com
EWW LOL!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
SHOUTING isn't fun to read!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
heheWww@Enter-QA@Com
haha =)
by the way is this story about Fizzdude and his wife!?Www@Enter-QA@Com
by the way is this story about Fizzdude and his wife!?Www@Enter-QA@Com
Lol, I sooo gotta use that one on my bf!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
oldWww@Enter-QA@Com