Whats your faviroute joke?!
Question: Whats your faviroute joke!?
Answers:
this my favourite sorry its a bit long
Male Bear and frog walk into woods and find a magic lantern, they both rub it together and out pops a genie who says
" i will grant you both 3 wishes"
The Bear says " i wish every bear in the woods were Female"
The Frog says "I wish i had a motorcycle helmet
Bear says "second wish i wish every bear in neighbouring woods were female"
Frog second wish asks "i wish i had a motorbike"
Bear for third wish says" I wish every bear in the world was female"
The frog puts on his helmet, gets on his bike and drives away and shouts back
"I WISH THE BEAR WAS GAY"Www@Enter-QA@Com
Male Bear and frog walk into woods and find a magic lantern, they both rub it together and out pops a genie who says
" i will grant you both 3 wishes"
The Bear says " i wish every bear in the woods were Female"
The Frog says "I wish i had a motorcycle helmet
Bear says "second wish i wish every bear in neighbouring woods were female"
Frog second wish asks "i wish i had a motorbike"
Bear for third wish says" I wish every bear in the world was female"
The frog puts on his helmet, gets on his bike and drives away and shouts back
"I WISH THE BEAR WAS GAY"Www@Enter-QA@Com
LOL you made me laugh!
" I don't know why I spelled favourite like that"
Anyhoo, here is my favorite joke
It was this little girl's first day of school and the teacher asked her what her name was and she replied, "Happy Butt!." The teacher said, "Honey I don't think that's your name you need to go to the principal's office and get this straightened out!." So she went to the principal's office and he asked, "What's your name!?" And the little girl said, "Happy Butt!."
The principal called the girl's mother to get this straightened out once and for all!. After getting off the phone he looked at the little girl and said, "Honey, your name's is Gladys, not Happy Butt!."
The girl then exclaimed, "Glad ***, Happy Butt" what's the difference!?Www@Enter-QA@Com
" I don't know why I spelled favourite like that"
Anyhoo, here is my favorite joke
It was this little girl's first day of school and the teacher asked her what her name was and she replied, "Happy Butt!." The teacher said, "Honey I don't think that's your name you need to go to the principal's office and get this straightened out!." So she went to the principal's office and he asked, "What's your name!?" And the little girl said, "Happy Butt!."
The principal called the girl's mother to get this straightened out once and for all!. After getting off the phone he looked at the little girl and said, "Honey, your name's is Gladys, not Happy Butt!."
The girl then exclaimed, "Glad ***, Happy Butt" what's the difference!?Www@Enter-QA@Com
Blonde Logic:
January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight!.
February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels!.!.!.!.!."duh"!.!.!.!.!.bottles won't fit in typewriter!!!
March - Got excited!.!.!.!.!.finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months!.!.!.!.!.box said "2-4 years!"
April - Trapped on escalator for hours!.!.!.!.!.power went out!!!
May - Tried to make Kool-Aid!.!.!.!.!.8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!
June - Tried to go water skiing!.!.!.!.!.couldn't find a lake with a slope!.
July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition!.!.!.!.!.learned later, other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!
August - Got locked out of car in rain storm!.!.!.!.!.car swamped, because top was down!.
September - The capital of California is "C"!.!.!.!.!.isn't it!?!?!?
October - Hate M & M's!.!.!.!.!.they are so hard to peel!.
November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days!.!.!.!.!.instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!!
December - Couldn't call 911!.!.!.!.!."duh"!.!.!.!.!.there's no "eleven" button on the phone!!!Www@Enter-QA@Com
January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight!.
February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels!.!.!.!.!."duh"!.!.!.!.!.bottles won't fit in typewriter!!!
March - Got excited!.!.!.!.!.finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months!.!.!.!.!.box said "2-4 years!"
April - Trapped on escalator for hours!.!.!.!.!.power went out!!!
May - Tried to make Kool-Aid!.!.!.!.!.8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!
June - Tried to go water skiing!.!.!.!.!.couldn't find a lake with a slope!.
July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition!.!.!.!.!.learned later, other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!
August - Got locked out of car in rain storm!.!.!.!.!.car swamped, because top was down!.
September - The capital of California is "C"!.!.!.!.!.isn't it!?!?!?
October - Hate M & M's!.!.!.!.!.they are so hard to peel!.
November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days!.!.!.!.!.instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!!
December - Couldn't call 911!.!.!.!.!."duh"!.!.!.!.!.there's no "eleven" button on the phone!!!Www@Enter-QA@Com
Tiger Woods is driving his BMW in Ireland and he stops to get some petrol!. The forecourt attendant says "top o' the morning to ya"!. He fills Tigers car up with petrol and then Tiger follows him into the shop to pay!. As he pulls out his wallet, 2 tee's fall out of his pocket and the forecourt attendant says "what on earth are they for!?", Tiger replies "they are for resting my balls on when I'm driving"!. The forecourt guy says "feckin hell, BMW thinks of everything"Www@Enter-QA@Com
A waitress walks up to one of her tables in a New York City restaurant and notices that the three Japanese businessmen seated there are furiously masturbating!.
“What the hell do you think you are doing!?” she says!.
One of the Japanese men replies: “We are all very hungry!.”
The waitress asks, “So how is jerking off in this restaurant going to help the situation!?”
A second businessman replies, “Because menu say, FIRST COME, FIRST SERVED!.”Www@Enter-QA@Com
“What the hell do you think you are doing!?” she says!.
One of the Japanese men replies: “We are all very hungry!.”
The waitress asks, “So how is jerking off in this restaurant going to help the situation!?”
A second businessman replies, “Because menu say, FIRST COME, FIRST SERVED!.”Www@Enter-QA@Com
A bus stops and 2 men get on with really strong accents!. They sit down and
have a conversation!.
The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first,
but all of a sudden when she hears one of them say the following:
"Emma come first!. Den I come!. Den two esses acoma together!. I
come once-a-more!. Two esses, they comma together again!. I
come again and pee twice!. Then I come one lasta time!."
"You dirty-mouth pigs," yelled the lady
!.” In this country !. !. !. we don't speak dirty in
public places about our sex lives!. !. !. "
"Hey, relax lady whats sa-matter for you!?," said the man!. "Who talkin' abouta
sex!?
I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spell 'Mississippi'!."
so theres this doctor that did circumcisions!.After many years he decides its time to retire!.All the circumsicions he did over the years,he saved the foreskins!.He took the big garbag full of foreskins to his friend who works at a leather company!.He says"Make me something nice out of these foreskins,cuz im retiring!." His friend says"Come back in 2 weeks and ill have something nice for you!."So he goes in 2 weeks to see what his friend made him!.When he shows up 2 weeks later,his friend presents him with 5 nice wallets!. He says to his friend"wallets!!? Is that all i get after all these years!!?" His friend says"Relax my friend!.You see its not just ordinary wallets!. After you rub them for a while,it becomes a 5 piece luggage set!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
have a conversation!.
The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first,
but all of a sudden when she hears one of them say the following:
"Emma come first!. Den I come!. Den two esses acoma together!. I
come once-a-more!. Two esses, they comma together again!. I
come again and pee twice!. Then I come one lasta time!."
"You dirty-mouth pigs," yelled the lady
!.” In this country !. !. !. we don't speak dirty in
public places about our sex lives!. !. !. "
"Hey, relax lady whats sa-matter for you!?," said the man!. "Who talkin' abouta
sex!?
I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spell 'Mississippi'!."
so theres this doctor that did circumcisions!.After many years he decides its time to retire!.All the circumsicions he did over the years,he saved the foreskins!.He took the big garbag full of foreskins to his friend who works at a leather company!.He says"Make me something nice out of these foreskins,cuz im retiring!." His friend says"Come back in 2 weeks and ill have something nice for you!."So he goes in 2 weeks to see what his friend made him!.When he shows up 2 weeks later,his friend presents him with 5 nice wallets!. He says to his friend"wallets!!? Is that all i get after all these years!!?" His friend says"Relax my friend!.You see its not just ordinary wallets!. After you rub them for a while,it becomes a 5 piece luggage set!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
maybe not my favourite!.
husband and wife and 9 children are waiting at a bus stop
a blind man join's them
after a few minute's a bus come's and being almost full the wife and 9 kid's get on
so the husband and blind man decide to walk , but being irritated by the tapping of the blind man's stick on the pavement , the man say's why don't you put a bit of rubber on the end of your stick it's driving me crazy
the blind man say's , if you had put a bit of rubber on the end of your stick we would be on the bus nowWww@Enter-QA@Com
husband and wife and 9 children are waiting at a bus stop
a blind man join's them
after a few minute's a bus come's and being almost full the wife and 9 kid's get on
so the husband and blind man decide to walk , but being irritated by the tapping of the blind man's stick on the pavement , the man say's why don't you put a bit of rubber on the end of your stick it's driving me crazy
the blind man say's , if you had put a bit of rubber on the end of your stick we would be on the bus nowWww@Enter-QA@Com
"i have a king size bed, i dont know any king but if one came over i guess he would be comfortable!. when i was a boy i layed in my twin size bed and wondered where my brother was" - mitch hedberg
"i have so much tartar i dont have to dip my fish sticks in s*it" -mitch hedberg
"the candy bar kit-kat has the words imprinted in the chocolate!. THAT ROBS YOU OF CHOCOLATE!" -Mitch hedberg
"the commercial for diet Dr!. Pepper says it taste just like regular Dr!. Pepper!. WELL THEN THEY FU*KED UP!! -mitch hedbergWww@Enter-QA@Com
"i have so much tartar i dont have to dip my fish sticks in s*it" -mitch hedberg
"the candy bar kit-kat has the words imprinted in the chocolate!. THAT ROBS YOU OF CHOCOLATE!" -Mitch hedberg
"the commercial for diet Dr!. Pepper says it taste just like regular Dr!. Pepper!. WELL THEN THEY FU*KED UP!! -mitch hedbergWww@Enter-QA@Com
!." dinner
Morris and his wife are seated in a fancy French restaurant for dinner!.
After the waiter arrives, the man says, "I'll have your biggest, thickest Porterhouse steak!.!.!.!.medium rare!. "
The waiter replies, "Monsieur, what about ze mad cow!?"
The man replies, "She'll have a saladWww@Enter-QA@Com
Morris and his wife are seated in a fancy French restaurant for dinner!.
After the waiter arrives, the man says, "I'll have your biggest, thickest Porterhouse steak!.!.!.!.medium rare!. "
The waiter replies, "Monsieur, what about ze mad cow!?"
The man replies, "She'll have a saladWww@Enter-QA@Com
haha!.!.!. love this one!.!.!.
a sailor walks into a butchers and buys some tripe!.
he says "please fill all the holes in the tripe with vinegar before you sell it to me"
How do you know that he is a sailor!?
He is wearing a sailors suit!.
HAHHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
lol, best joke ever ;)Www@Enter-QA@Com
a sailor walks into a butchers and buys some tripe!.
he says "please fill all the holes in the tripe with vinegar before you sell it to me"
How do you know that he is a sailor!?
He is wearing a sailors suit!.
HAHHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
lol, best joke ever ;)Www@Enter-QA@Com
a priest, a rabbi, hitler, two lesbians and a nun walked into a bar!. the bartender looked up and said: "what is this some kind of joke!?"Www@Enter-QA@Com
What is the difference with a onion and a chelsea fan!?
Nobody cries when u cut a chelsea fanWww@Enter-QA@Com
Nobody cries when u cut a chelsea fanWww@Enter-QA@Com
Why did the blonde jump off the cliff!?
-She though tampax had wings
Hahaa :)Www@Enter-QA@Com
-She though tampax had wings
Hahaa :)Www@Enter-QA@Com
I don't have a favorite joke!. I like a lot of themWww@Enter-QA@Com
the way you spelled favorite!. that is funnyWww@Enter-QA@Com
THIS ONEWww@Enter-QA@Com