Do you need a Husband?!
Question: Do you need a Husband!?
Subject: WANTED: HUSBAND!!!
A lonely widow, aged 70, decided that it was time to get married again!. So she put an ad in the local newspaper that read:
WANTED: HUSBAND!
MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70's),
MUST NOT BEAT ME!.
MUST NOT RUN AROUND ON ME,
AND MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED!
ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE APPLY IN PERSON!.
On the second day she heard the doorbell!. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheel chair!. He had no arms or legs!.
'You're not really asking me to consider you, are you!?' the widow said!. 'Just look at you - you have no legs!'
The old gentleman smiled, ' Therefore, I cannot run around on you!'
'You don't have any arms either!' she snorted!.
Again, the old man smiled, 'Therefore, I can never beat you!'
She raised an eyebrow and asked intently, 'Are you still good in bed!?!?'
The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said, 'I rang the doorbell, didn't I!?'
The wedding is scheduled for SaturdayWww@Enter-QA@Com
A lonely widow, aged 70, decided that it was time to get married again!. So she put an ad in the local newspaper that read:
WANTED: HUSBAND!
MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70's),
MUST NOT BEAT ME!.
MUST NOT RUN AROUND ON ME,
AND MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED!
ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE APPLY IN PERSON!.
On the second day she heard the doorbell!. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheel chair!. He had no arms or legs!.
'You're not really asking me to consider you, are you!?' the widow said!. 'Just look at you - you have no legs!'
The old gentleman smiled, ' Therefore, I cannot run around on you!'
'You don't have any arms either!' she snorted!.
Again, the old man smiled, 'Therefore, I can never beat you!'
She raised an eyebrow and asked intently, 'Are you still good in bed!?!?'
The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said, 'I rang the doorbell, didn't I!?'
The wedding is scheduled for SaturdayWww@Enter-QA@Com
Answers:
I work with this particular age population, so I always enjoy a good joke about elderly people that I can share with my co-workers!. Thanks for the laugh!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
Implicit but definitely brilliant, excellent joke, well done, and thanx for sharing with us!.!.!.!Www@Enter-QA@Com
that thing must be pretty uhm long!.!.!.oh nevermind
it was a great joke so thanks for the laugh!Www@Enter-QA@Com
it was a great joke so thanks for the laugh!Www@Enter-QA@Com
Dang grandpa, you reach the doorbell!? LOL!.!.
Grandma! You freak!Www@Enter-QA@Com
Grandma! You freak!Www@Enter-QA@Com
Lol, lucky lady!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
Lmfao!.!.
WOWZERSZ!Www@Enter-QA@Com
WOWZERSZ!Www@Enter-QA@Com
Took me a minute!.!.!.!.but then I got it! Very funny, have a star!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
ROFLMAO!! xD
That's a good one!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
That's a good one!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
That was really funny! Here's one for you!
Bet you never thought of this!.!.!. New Treatment For Sunburn
- A guy fell asleep on the beach for several hours and got horrible sunburn, specifically to his upper legs!. He went to the hospital, and was promptly admitted after being diagnosed with second-degree burns!. With his skin already starting to blister, and the severe pain he was in, the doctor prescribed continuous intravenous feeding with saline, electrolytes, a sedative, and a Viagra pill every four hours!. The nurse, who was rather astounded, asked, 'What good will Viagra do for him, Doctor'!? The doctor replied, 'It won't do anything for his condition, but it'll keep the sheets off of his legsWww@Enter-QA@Com
Bet you never thought of this!.!.!. New Treatment For Sunburn
- A guy fell asleep on the beach for several hours and got horrible sunburn, specifically to his upper legs!. He went to the hospital, and was promptly admitted after being diagnosed with second-degree burns!. With his skin already starting to blister, and the severe pain he was in, the doctor prescribed continuous intravenous feeding with saline, electrolytes, a sedative, and a Viagra pill every four hours!. The nurse, who was rather astounded, asked, 'What good will Viagra do for him, Doctor'!? The doctor replied, 'It won't do anything for his condition, but it'll keep the sheets off of his legsWww@Enter-QA@Com
good one!.!.!.!.!.excellent
thats just hilarious lol
!.!.!.!.!.good job!.!.!.!.!.keep up the good ones
There were these twin sisters just turning one hundred years old in St!. Luke's Nursing Home and the editor of the local newspaper told a photographer to get over there and take the pictures of these 100 year old twin biddies!.
One of the twins was hard of hearing but the other could hear quite well!.
The photographer asked them to sit on the sofa!.
The deaf one said to her twin, "WHAT DID HE SAY!?"
"WE GOTTA SIT OVER THERE ON THE SOFA!", said the other!.
"Now get a little closer together", said the cameraman!.
Again, "WHAT DID HE SAY!?"
"HE SAYS SQUEEZE TOGETHER A LITTLE"!.
So, they wiggled up close to each other!.
"Just hold on for a bit longer, I've got to focus a little," said the photographer!.
Yet again - "WHAT DID HE SAY!?"
"HE SAYS HE'S GONNA FOCUS!"
With a big grin the deaf twin shouted out, "OH MY GOD - BOTH OF US!?
An old woman walks into a singles bar looking for a little action!. A distinguished older gentleman approaches her and they really hit it off!. After a few drinks they decide to get a hotel room and get it on!. As they sit naked on the bed, the old man takes out his hearing aids and moves in!. The old woman stops him and says, "before we do this, i should tell you i have acute angina!." The old man looks at her, smiles and says, I sure hope so, cause you got ugly boobs
An old man, went to the doctor to get a physical!.
A few days later, he was seen walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm!.
A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to him and said, "You're really doing great, aren't you!?"
He replied, "Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful!.'"
The doctor said, "I didn't say that!. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur; be careful!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
thats just hilarious lol
!.!.!.!.!.good job!.!.!.!.!.keep up the good ones
There were these twin sisters just turning one hundred years old in St!. Luke's Nursing Home and the editor of the local newspaper told a photographer to get over there and take the pictures of these 100 year old twin biddies!.
One of the twins was hard of hearing but the other could hear quite well!.
The photographer asked them to sit on the sofa!.
The deaf one said to her twin, "WHAT DID HE SAY!?"
"WE GOTTA SIT OVER THERE ON THE SOFA!", said the other!.
"Now get a little closer together", said the cameraman!.
Again, "WHAT DID HE SAY!?"
"HE SAYS SQUEEZE TOGETHER A LITTLE"!.
So, they wiggled up close to each other!.
"Just hold on for a bit longer, I've got to focus a little," said the photographer!.
Yet again - "WHAT DID HE SAY!?"
"HE SAYS HE'S GONNA FOCUS!"
With a big grin the deaf twin shouted out, "OH MY GOD - BOTH OF US!?
An old woman walks into a singles bar looking for a little action!. A distinguished older gentleman approaches her and they really hit it off!. After a few drinks they decide to get a hotel room and get it on!. As they sit naked on the bed, the old man takes out his hearing aids and moves in!. The old woman stops him and says, "before we do this, i should tell you i have acute angina!." The old man looks at her, smiles and says, I sure hope so, cause you got ugly boobs
An old man, went to the doctor to get a physical!.
A few days later, he was seen walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm!.
A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to him and said, "You're really doing great, aren't you!?"
He replied, "Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful!.'"
The doctor said, "I didn't say that!. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur; be careful!."Www@Enter-QA@Com