'A man walks into a bar..." jokes. Any good?!


Question: 'A man walks into a bar!.!.!." jokes!. Any good!?
A man walks into a bar, sits down, and orders a drink!. The bartender gives him his drink, accompanied by a bowl of peanuts!.

To his surprise, a voice comes from the peanut bowl!.

"You look great tonight!" it said!. "You really look fantastic - and that aftershave is just wonderful!"

The man is obviously a little confused, but tries to ignore it!.

Realising he has no cigarettes, he wanders over to the cigarette machine!. After inserting his money, another voice emits from the machine!.

"Who let you in here!? Did you check the mirror before you left the house!? Get away from me, you oaf!"

By now, the man is extremely perplexed!. He turns to the bartender for an explanation!.

"Ah yes sir," the bartender responds!. "The peanuts are complimentary, but the cigarette machine is out of order!."



A man walks into a bar and hears piano music!. He looks at the piano and can't see anyone sitting there, so he walks over and discovers a foot-tall man standing on the piano bench playing away!. The man thinks this is strange so he goes over to the barman and asks where the little bloke came from!.

"Here," says the bartender, handing the man a lamp, "rub this!."

So the man rubs the lamp and out comes this genie!. "What do you wish for!?" asks the genie!.

"A million pounds," the man states, quite sure of himself!.

"Granted!." And the genie claps his hands and disappears back into the lamp!. The man looks around, checks his wallet but can't find a million bucks anywhere!. Just that moment, a million dogs come through the door!. Astounded the man says:

"Hey! I didn't ask for a million hounds!"

"Do you think that I asked for a 12 inch pianist!?" replies the bartender!.



A man rushes into a bar, orders the four most expensive 30-year-old single malts in the house and has the barman line them up in front of him!. Then without pausing, he quickly downs each one!.

"Whew," the barman remarks, "You seem to be in a hurry!."

"You would be too if you had what I have," the man replies!.

"Why, what do you have!?" the barman asks sympathetically!.

"Fifty pence!."Www@Enter-QA@Com


Answers:
Ha ha ha!.!!!
Very good ones so 10/10!.!!!
Cheers that got me smiling!.!!!Www@Enter-QA@Com

something is missing, ie, wit, humour is needed to tell a joke but wit is essential!. to parody your last joke a guy says i have got what money cant buy, answer, POVERTY, but is that funny or just droll and no wit!.
Www@Enter-QA@Com

VERY HILARIOUS!! :)Www@Enter-QA@Com

man-0= jokes -0Www@Enter-QA@Com

Have some peanuts, your looking great today! ~ : )Www@Enter-QA@Com

the 2nd 1s the best but no!.1 and 3 r just lameWww@Enter-QA@Com

Hehe second one's funny, first and third not so much lol!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

These are great, well done, I love 'em!.!.!.!Www@Enter-QA@Com

They Made Me Lol All Over The FloorWww@Enter-QA@Com

The 1st was corny but the others were a waste!.!.!.sorryWww@Enter-QA@Com

ta 4 the laffWww@Enter-QA@Com

Very nice :]

Made me laugh!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

A man walks into a bar!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!. and knocks himself senseless!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

poor sense of humuorWww@Enter-QA@Com

man walks into a bar jokes are never good!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

I got another:

A man walks into a bar and orders a drink!. The bartender looks at the man and says, "Got any money this time!?"

The man says, "I'll tell a joke for a drink this time!." The bartender agrees, and the guy said, "Well, I guess I'll tell a blond joke!."

At that moment, a shadow falls over him, and it turns out this huge man is standing behind him!. The gorilla says, "That's not so wise!. See, I'm a blond wrestler!. The guy over there is a blond sumo wrestler!. And that guy in the corner is a blond boxer, known for the many matches he's won!."

The man looks at the three blond men, then turns back to the bartender!. "Forget about the drink!. I don't want to explain the joke three times!."

Pardon me, all blond people out there!. This is just so funny! Www@Enter-QA@Com



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