Heard the one about "The Amazing Scotsman"?!
Question: Heard the one about "The Amazing Scotsman"!?
A salesman drove into a small town where a circus was in progress!.
A sign read: 'Don't Miss The Amazing Scotsman'!. The salesman bought a ticket and sat down!. There, on centre stage, was a table with three walnuts on it!. Standing next to it was an old Scotsman!. Suddenly the old man lifted his kilt, whipped out a huge willy and smashed all three walnuts with three mighty swings!
The crowd erupted in applause as the elderly Scot was carried off on the shoulders of the crowd!.
Ten years later the salesman visited the same little town and saw a faded sign for the same circus and the same sign 'Don't Miss The Amazing Scotsman'!. He couldn't believe the old guy was still alive much less still doing his act! He bought a ticket!. Again, the centre ring was illuminated!.
This time, however, instead of walnuts, three coconuts were placed on the table!. The Scotsman stood before them, then suddenly lifted his kilt and shattered the coconuts with three swings of his amazing member!. The crowd went wild! Flabbergasted, the salesman requested a meeting with him after the show!.
'You're incredible!' he told the Scotsman!. 'But I have to know something!. You're older now, why switch from walnuts to coconuts!?'
'Well laddie,' said the Scot, 'Ma eyes are nae whit they used tae be
Www@Enter-QA@Com
A sign read: 'Don't Miss The Amazing Scotsman'!. The salesman bought a ticket and sat down!. There, on centre stage, was a table with three walnuts on it!. Standing next to it was an old Scotsman!. Suddenly the old man lifted his kilt, whipped out a huge willy and smashed all three walnuts with three mighty swings!
The crowd erupted in applause as the elderly Scot was carried off on the shoulders of the crowd!.
Ten years later the salesman visited the same little town and saw a faded sign for the same circus and the same sign 'Don't Miss The Amazing Scotsman'!. He couldn't believe the old guy was still alive much less still doing his act! He bought a ticket!. Again, the centre ring was illuminated!.
This time, however, instead of walnuts, three coconuts were placed on the table!. The Scotsman stood before them, then suddenly lifted his kilt and shattered the coconuts with three swings of his amazing member!. The crowd went wild! Flabbergasted, the salesman requested a meeting with him after the show!.
'You're incredible!' he told the Scotsman!. 'But I have to know something!. You're older now, why switch from walnuts to coconuts!?'
'Well laddie,' said the Scot, 'Ma eyes are nae whit they used tae be
Www@Enter-QA@Com
Answers:
Another good Scotsman joke (there's actually a song version of it, but don't recall the lyrics exactly)
A scot staggered out of the local pub on his way home, but passes out on the side of the road before he makes it!. A bit later, a pair of ladies spot him lying there!.
One says, "Och, isn't that young McTavish lyin' there!? I've heard he's a bonny bull where it counts! Is it true that Scotmen don't wear anything under the kilt!?"
"I've heard that too!.!.!.why don't we take advantage and have a peek!?"
They creep up and one gently lifts up the kilt!. Both stare at the man's impressive package, swinging free in the breeze!. Before they go, one of them takes her blue hair ribbon and carefully ties it in a bow around his member as a prank!.
Sometime later, the man wakens from his stupor and staggers to his feet!. Before continuing on home, he feels the need to empty his bladder!. Lifting his kilt, he gawps at what he sees!. "Och, laddie!.!.!.I dinnae where you've been tonight, but I see you won first prize!"Www@Enter-QA@Com
A scot staggered out of the local pub on his way home, but passes out on the side of the road before he makes it!. A bit later, a pair of ladies spot him lying there!.
One says, "Och, isn't that young McTavish lyin' there!? I've heard he's a bonny bull where it counts! Is it true that Scotmen don't wear anything under the kilt!?"
"I've heard that too!.!.!.why don't we take advantage and have a peek!?"
They creep up and one gently lifts up the kilt!. Both stare at the man's impressive package, swinging free in the breeze!. Before they go, one of them takes her blue hair ribbon and carefully ties it in a bow around his member as a prank!.
Sometime later, the man wakens from his stupor and staggers to his feet!. Before continuing on home, he feels the need to empty his bladder!. Lifting his kilt, he gawps at what he sees!. "Och, laddie!.!.!.I dinnae where you've been tonight, but I see you won first prize!"Www@Enter-QA@Com
No I have not heard that joke before and it was very good and I had a good laugh!. 20 out of 10 for the joke and also a gold star, thanks for sharing it with us and brightening the evening up!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
I liked that one!. I've not heard it before which is quite refreshing!. Is it true that two Scotsmen invented copper wire, fighting over a penny!Www@Enter-QA@Com
hahahahahave a starWww@Enter-QA@Com
very funnyWww@Enter-QA@Com
AAAWWW! My God! That was awesome! LMAO!!!!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
thats pretty funnyWww@Enter-QA@Com
I have never heard that one before and it was a good one lol!.
Have a star from me!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
Have a star from me!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
That's a cracker! Te-he!Www@Enter-QA@Com
GOOD ON YA!Www@Enter-QA@Com
Too long!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
lolWww@Enter-QA@Com
that is really good but i did'nt really get the endWww@Enter-QA@Com
oh very goodWww@Enter-QA@Com
lol funny!.!.!.but why is it a salesman!?Www@Enter-QA@Com