Tell me a joke please ?!
Question: Tell me a joke please !?
I want to choose most funniest jokes lolWww@Enter-QA@Com
Answers:
>>>A pastor uses a standard liturgy for funerals!. to personalize each service, he enters a "find and replace" command into his word processor!. the computer then finds the name of the deceased from the previous funeral and replaces it with the name for the upcoming one!.
not long ago, the pastor told the computer to find the name "Mary" and replace it with "Edna"!. the next morning the funeral was going smoothly until the congregation intoned the Apostle's Creed!. "Jesus Christ" they read from the preprinted program, "born of the Virgin Edna" =DWww@Enter-QA@Com
not long ago, the pastor told the computer to find the name "Mary" and replace it with "Edna"!. the next morning the funeral was going smoothly until the congregation intoned the Apostle's Creed!. "Jesus Christ" they read from the preprinted program, "born of the Virgin Edna" =DWww@Enter-QA@Com
One day when the teacher walked to the note board, she noticed someone had
written the word 'penis' in tiny small letters!. She turned around, scanned the
class looking for the guilty face!. Finding none, she quickly erased it, and
began her class!.
The next day she went into the room and she saw, in larger letters, the word
'penis' again on the note board!. Again, she looked around in vain for the
culprit, but found none, so she proceeded with the day's lesson!.
Every morning, for about a week, she went into the classroom and found the
same word written on the board, and each day it was written in larger letters!.
Finally, one day, she walked in, expecting to be greeted by the same word on
the board, but instead, found the words, "The more you rub it, the bigger it
gets!"Www@Enter-QA@Com
written the word 'penis' in tiny small letters!. She turned around, scanned the
class looking for the guilty face!. Finding none, she quickly erased it, and
began her class!.
The next day she went into the room and she saw, in larger letters, the word
'penis' again on the note board!. Again, she looked around in vain for the
culprit, but found none, so she proceeded with the day's lesson!.
Every morning, for about a week, she went into the classroom and found the
same word written on the board, and each day it was written in larger letters!.
Finally, one day, she walked in, expecting to be greeted by the same word on
the board, but instead, found the words, "The more you rub it, the bigger it
gets!"Www@Enter-QA@Com
Little Johnny came home from school one day and said to his father, "Dad, what can you tell me about politics!? I have to learn about it for school tomorrow!."
The father thought some and said, "Okay, son, the best way I can describe politics is to use an analogy!. Let’s say that I’m capitalism because I’m the breadwinner!. Your mother will be government because she controls everything, our maid will be the working class because she works for us, you will be the people because you answer to us, and your baby brother will be the future!. Does that help any!?"
Little Johnny said, "Well, Dad, I don’t know, but I’ll think about what you said!."
Later that night, after everyone had gone to bed, Johnny was woken up by his brother’s crying!. Upon further investigation, he found a dirty diaper!.
So, he went down the hall to his parent’s bedroom and found his father’s side of the bed empty and his mother wouldn’t wake up!. Then he saw a light on in the guest room down the hall, and when he reached the door, he saw through the crack that his father was in bed with the maid!. Because he couldn’t do anything else, he turned and went back to bed!.
The next morning, he said to his father at the breakfast table, "Dad, I think I understand politics much better now!."
"Excellent, my boy," he answered, "What have you learned!?"
Little Johnny thought for a minute and said, "I learned that capitalism is screwing the working class, government is sound asleep ignoring the people, and the future’s full of sh*t!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
The father thought some and said, "Okay, son, the best way I can describe politics is to use an analogy!. Let’s say that I’m capitalism because I’m the breadwinner!. Your mother will be government because she controls everything, our maid will be the working class because she works for us, you will be the people because you answer to us, and your baby brother will be the future!. Does that help any!?"
Little Johnny said, "Well, Dad, I don’t know, but I’ll think about what you said!."
Later that night, after everyone had gone to bed, Johnny was woken up by his brother’s crying!. Upon further investigation, he found a dirty diaper!.
So, he went down the hall to his parent’s bedroom and found his father’s side of the bed empty and his mother wouldn’t wake up!. Then he saw a light on in the guest room down the hall, and when he reached the door, he saw through the crack that his father was in bed with the maid!. Because he couldn’t do anything else, he turned and went back to bed!.
The next morning, he said to his father at the breakfast table, "Dad, I think I understand politics much better now!."
"Excellent, my boy," he answered, "What have you learned!?"
Little Johnny thought for a minute and said, "I learned that capitalism is screwing the working class, government is sound asleep ignoring the people, and the future’s full of sh*t!."Www@Enter-QA@Com
what do you call an anorexic girl with a yeast infection!?!?
a quarter pounder with cheese!Www@Enter-QA@Com
a quarter pounder with cheese!Www@Enter-QA@Com