Is this funny? if not can you do better?!
Question: Is this funny!? if not can you do better!?
A guy was driving around Dublin when he saw a sign in front of a house,
'Talking Dog for Sale!.'
He rang the bell and the owner told him the dog was in the backyard!. The guy went into the backyard and saw a Labrador sitting there!.
'You talk!?' he asked!.
'Yes,' the Lab replied!.
'So, what's the story!?'
The Lab looked up and said, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young!. I wanted to help the government, so I told the Garda about my gift, and in no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping!. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running!.'
'But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down!. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security wandering near suspicious characters and listening in!. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals!. I got married, had a load of puppies, and now I'm just retired!.'
The guy was amazed!. He goes back in and asked the owner what he wanted for the dog!.
'Ten euros!.' the man said!.
'Ten euros!? This dog is amazing!. Why on earth are you selling him so cheap!?'
'Because he's a liar!. He never did any of that shíte!.'
Www@Enter-QA@Com
'Talking Dog for Sale!.'
He rang the bell and the owner told him the dog was in the backyard!. The guy went into the backyard and saw a Labrador sitting there!.
'You talk!?' he asked!.
'Yes,' the Lab replied!.
'So, what's the story!?'
The Lab looked up and said, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young!. I wanted to help the government, so I told the Garda about my gift, and in no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping!. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running!.'
'But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down!. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security wandering near suspicious characters and listening in!. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals!. I got married, had a load of puppies, and now I'm just retired!.'
The guy was amazed!. He goes back in and asked the owner what he wanted for the dog!.
'Ten euros!.' the man said!.
'Ten euros!? This dog is amazing!. Why on earth are you selling him so cheap!?'
'Because he's a liar!. He never did any of that shíte!.'
Www@Enter-QA@Com
Answers:
haha that was so funny!!!!!!!!!
here are more dog jokes
Great Directions here for a real clean toilet!!! easy too!!!!
1!. Lift both lids on your toilet bowl and add a couple of capfuls of shampoo to the water!.
2!. Go to the other room where the cat is sleeping, pick it up and soothe it while you carry it towards the bathroom!.
3!. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids (You may need to stand on the lid, afterwards)!. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds!.
(Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this!.)
4!. Flush the toilet three or four times!.
(This provides a "power-wash" and "rinse")
5!. Have someone open the closest door to the outside (Be sure that no one is between the toilet and the outside door!.)
6!. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids!.
7!. The cat will rocket out of the toilet and run outside where it will dry itself!. After this procedure, both the toilet and the cat will be sparkling clean!
Sincerely,
The Dog
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As a butcher is shooing a dog from his shop, he sees $10 and a note in his mouth, reading: "10 lamb chops, please!."
Amazed, he takes the money, puts a bag of chops in the dog's mouth, and quickly closes the shop!. He follows the dog and watches him wait for a green light, look both ways, and trot across the road to a bus stop!. The dog checks the timetable and sits on the bench!. When a bus arrives, he walks around to the front and looks at the number, then boards the bus!. The butcher follows, dumbstruck!.
As the bus travels out into the suburbs, the dog takes in the scenery!. After awhile he stands on his back paws to push the "stop" button, then the butcher follows him off!.
The dog runs up to a house and drops his bag on the stoop!. He goes back down the path, takes a big run, and throws himself -Whap!- against the door!. He does this again and again!. No answer!. So he jumps on a wall, walks around the garden, beats his head against a window, jumps off, and waits at the front door!. A big guy opens it and yells at the the dog!.
The butcher runs up screams at the guy: "What in the world are you doing!? This dog's a genius!" The owner responds, "Genius!? I don't think so!. It's the second time this week he's forgotten his key!" Www@Enter-QA@Com
here are more dog jokes
Great Directions here for a real clean toilet!!! easy too!!!!
1!. Lift both lids on your toilet bowl and add a couple of capfuls of shampoo to the water!.
2!. Go to the other room where the cat is sleeping, pick it up and soothe it while you carry it towards the bathroom!.
3!. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids (You may need to stand on the lid, afterwards)!. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds!.
(Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this!.)
4!. Flush the toilet three or four times!.
(This provides a "power-wash" and "rinse")
5!. Have someone open the closest door to the outside (Be sure that no one is between the toilet and the outside door!.)
6!. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids!.
7!. The cat will rocket out of the toilet and run outside where it will dry itself!. After this procedure, both the toilet and the cat will be sparkling clean!
Sincerely,
The Dog
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
As a butcher is shooing a dog from his shop, he sees $10 and a note in his mouth, reading: "10 lamb chops, please!."
Amazed, he takes the money, puts a bag of chops in the dog's mouth, and quickly closes the shop!. He follows the dog and watches him wait for a green light, look both ways, and trot across the road to a bus stop!. The dog checks the timetable and sits on the bench!. When a bus arrives, he walks around to the front and looks at the number, then boards the bus!. The butcher follows, dumbstruck!.
As the bus travels out into the suburbs, the dog takes in the scenery!. After awhile he stands on his back paws to push the "stop" button, then the butcher follows him off!.
The dog runs up to a house and drops his bag on the stoop!. He goes back down the path, takes a big run, and throws himself -Whap!- against the door!. He does this again and again!. No answer!. So he jumps on a wall, walks around the garden, beats his head against a window, jumps off, and waits at the front door!. A big guy opens it and yells at the the dog!.
The butcher runs up screams at the guy: "What in the world are you doing!? This dog's a genius!" The owner responds, "Genius!? I don't think so!. It's the second time this week he's forgotten his key!" Www@Enter-QA@Com
HAHA HEHE! i dont get it!.!.!.!. Ooh haha!
[= mine!?x
http://answers!.yahoo!.com/question/index;!.!.!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
[= mine!?x
http://answers!.yahoo!.com/question/index;!.!.!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
!?!!?
hahahaha!
cute one!Www@Enter-QA@Com
hahahaha!
cute one!Www@Enter-QA@Com
fuunnnyWww@Enter-QA@Com
Ha Ha!. Didn't see that one coming!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
lol!.!.!.never heard that one before :)Www@Enter-QA@Com
lol!!! foolish man and his clever dog!Www@Enter-QA@Com
I liked this joke, makes a change to find one I haven't seen before, thank you for posting it!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.lol!.!.!.!.
And try this one for size!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.
A cat died and went to Heaven!. God met her at the Pearly Gates, petted her on the head and said, "You have been a good cat for these 40 years!. Anything that you want is yours for the asking!." The cat thought for a minute and replied, "All my life I have lived on a farm and slept on hard wooden floors!. I would like a real fluffy pillow to sleep on!." God said, "Say no more!." Instantly the cat had a huge, fluffy pillow!. A few days later, six mice were killed in an accident, and they all went to heaven together!. God met them at the gates of Heaven with the same offer He made to the cat!. The mice said, "Well, all our lives we've had to run from dogs, cats and even people with brooms!. If we could just have some little roller skates, we'd never have to run again!." God said, "It is done!" All the mice had beautiful little roller skates!. About a week later, God decided to check on the cat!. He found her sound asleep on her fluffy pillow!. God gently awakened the cat and asked, "Is everything okay!? How you been doing!? Are you happy!?" The cat replied, "Oh, I've never been so happy in my life! My pillow is so fluffy, and those little meals-on-wheels you've been sending over here are delicious!Www@Enter-QA@Com
And try this one for size!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.
A cat died and went to Heaven!. God met her at the Pearly Gates, petted her on the head and said, "You have been a good cat for these 40 years!. Anything that you want is yours for the asking!." The cat thought for a minute and replied, "All my life I have lived on a farm and slept on hard wooden floors!. I would like a real fluffy pillow to sleep on!." God said, "Say no more!." Instantly the cat had a huge, fluffy pillow!. A few days later, six mice were killed in an accident, and they all went to heaven together!. God met them at the gates of Heaven with the same offer He made to the cat!. The mice said, "Well, all our lives we've had to run from dogs, cats and even people with brooms!. If we could just have some little roller skates, we'd never have to run again!." God said, "It is done!" All the mice had beautiful little roller skates!. About a week later, God decided to check on the cat!. He found her sound asleep on her fluffy pillow!. God gently awakened the cat and asked, "Is everything okay!? How you been doing!? Are you happy!?" The cat replied, "Oh, I've never been so happy in my life! My pillow is so fluffy, and those little meals-on-wheels you've been sending over here are delicious!Www@Enter-QA@Com