Tell me a funny math joke..?!


Question: Tell me a funny math joke!.!.!?
funniest one gets the derivative of 10x points!.!.hehe wow i need a life!.!.!.Www@Enter-QA@Com


Answers:
what is the product of 69 with 12 !?!?

jail timeWww@Enter-QA@Com

At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator!.
At a morning press conference, Attorney general John Ashcroft said he believes the man is a member of the notorious al-gebra movement!. He is being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction!.

"Al-gebra is a fearsome cult,", Ashcroft said!. "They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value!. They use secret code names like "x" and "y" and refer to themselves as "unknowns", but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country!.

"As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, there are 3 sides to every triangle," Ashcroft declared!.

"I am gratified that our government has given us a sine that it is intent on protracting us from these math-dogs who are willing to disintegrate us with calculus disregard!. Murky statisticians love to inflict plane on every sphere of influence," the President said, adding: "Under the circumferences, we must differentiate their root, make our point, and draw the line!."

President Bush warned, "These weapons of math instruction have the potential to decimal everything in their math on a scalene never before seen unless we become exponents of a Higher Power and begin to factor-in random facts of vertex!."

Attorney General Ashcroft said, "As our Great Leader would say, read my ellipse!. Here is one principle he is uncertainty of: though they continue to multiply, their days are numbered as the hypotenuse tightens around their necks!."

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes!." White house aides could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the president!.





A group of engineers and a group of mathematicians were going to a conference and found themselves on the same train!. The mathematicians were laughing at the engineers, who had somehow ended up with only one ticket among them!.

As the conductor was about to enter the car, the engineers all piled into the bathroom and slid the lock on the door!. The conductor, upon seeing that the bathroom was occupied, knocked on the door and said, "Ticket, please!." One of the engineers slid the engineers' lone ticket through the slot, the conductor punched it and slid it back through!.

On the return trip, the mathematicians were ready to try the trick themselves!. When they found that none of the engineers had remembered to buy a ticket, they were laughing and elbowing each other in the ribs, doubly gleeful at the prospect of a cheap trip home plus a chance to see the engineers get kicked off the train!.

As the conductor approached the car, the mathematicians piled into the bathroom!. A few seconds after the door closed, one of the engineers knocked on the door and said, in a disguised voice, "Ticket, please!."

The mathematicians slipped the ticket under the door!. The engineers took it and went into the next cubicle to await the real conductor!.!.!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

There was this bum, who always drank "Thunderbird"-------
One day!.!.!.the bum,drank some thunderbird,got drunk,!.!.And passed
out!.
A (rich) gay guy!.!.Came 'bee-boppin' down the alleyway; sees the bum
drunk,and passed out!. So he boinks the bum in the butt,!.!.but then he
felt bad about it;!.!.!.So he put a hundred-dollar-bill in his pocket; and
walks off!.
The next morning!.!.the bum wakes-up; finds the hundred-dollar-bill,in
his pocket;!.!.!.Went and bought a whole bunch of thunderbird; got drunk
and then!.!.passed-out!.
The (rich) gay guy,!.!.Came 'bee-boppin' down the alleyway!.!.!.!.sees the
drunken-bum; passed out!.!.!.!.boinks him in the butt -- Feels bad about it
and puts another hundred-dollar-bill,in his pocket; and walks off!.
The next morning!.!.the bum woke up,!.!.and finds the hundred-dollar-bill
in his pocket;!.!.!.!.
But he don't go and buy any thunderbird!.!.So he isn't drunk,or passed-out; when
the (rich) gay guy Comes 'bee-boppin' down the alleyway!.!.!.!.
He stops,and asks the bum,!.!."Hey man! How-come you ain't drunk and
passed-out by now!?!!?"
The bum says!.!.!."Because,Man!!! That thunderbird!.!.was TEARIN' "MY
***" UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Www@Enter-QA@Com

Band joke- What does crossing the road have to do with music!?
(ANSWER) you have to C#(sharp) if you don't want Bb(flat)!.

BTW on the other question, you can't ask 'who's the liar' because
1!. He could be lying
2!. That doesn't help youWww@Enter-QA@Com

1!. geometry can kiss my angle-side-side!
2!. another kind of math: add a bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs, and multiply!Www@Enter-QA@Com

What do you get if you divide the cirucmference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter!?



Pumpkin Pi!

Www@Enter-QA@Com

how do you teach a hot girl maths!?

subtract the clothes

divide the legs

and give her a square root

xxWww@Enter-QA@Com

What did the acorn say when it grew up!?

"Geometry!" (Gee, I'm a tree! Get it!? I'm a HOOT I tell ya!.!.!.hahahayaya)Www@Enter-QA@Com

Nice joke cornni!.Www@Enter-QA@Com



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