Once someone rubs you the wrong way, and you decide you don't like them, do !


Question: All the time. I can't hold a grudge worth a damn. If someone apologizes and changes whatever behavior pissed me off, I just let it go and move on like it never happened. Of course, depending on the specifics of the event, sometimes that process might take a little longer.


Answers: All the time. I can't hold a grudge worth a damn. If someone apologizes and changes whatever behavior pissed me off, I just let it go and move on like it never happened. Of course, depending on the specifics of the event, sometimes that process might take a little longer.

I have decided that but I can always change, some people just go through the motions and then become a better person because of it.

once in a while, but generally not.

I usually give someone the benefit of the doubt. But if they continue to rub me the wrong way then I just stay away from them.

my mind can be changed, yet i very rarely decide i dont like sum1, i pretty much dont mind anyone.

Yes, I change my mind. I've done that many times.

persistancy pays off. i didn't think much of fireball or francine or the WSIDR when i was new here...but now, through sheer inundation, i appreciate them.

in the real life that is harder because i don't usually give people a chance to endear themselves to me that i disdain.

The people that irritate me don't stop, unfortunately. :-(

I can change my mind if they do something to redeem themselves. i.e. do something nice for someone.

usually not....it takes a lot to rub me the wrong way...so it must take a lot to.....un-rub me the wrong way.....

i have on occasion changed my mind, but not very often.

Absolutely!

Three examples:

1) My college film class instructor is now a colleague, and she adores me. I have yet to figure out why. But how can you dislike someone who adores you?

2) My college writing instructor . . . who I felt didn't do a great job teaching the class and who was the only writing instructor who gave me a B . . . she and I have become friendly. I have a lot of respect for her, and I would like to do what she does for a living, so I follow her example.

3) This is more judgmental than being rubbed the wrong way, but I was out at my fiance's work party, and the guest of honor walked in with his girlfriend. She was skinny and pretty, so I didn't give much thought to her. When she said she cleaned the house in heels, I definitely didn't want anything to do with her. As the night progressed, we discovered we had a ton in common, and we exchanged e-mail addresses. :)

Normally I tell them how I like to be rubbed ;)

Seriously there is a boundary that once passed, I have yet to forgive but its only maybe 2-3 people in my life have earnt that honour.

Like the guy that attacked my friend with a knife over his religous views. I will not forgive or forget that.

You know, I used to work with a guy who was so obnoxious and hyper, when I first met him, I didn't like one thing about him. But I was stuck with him! I had to work right alongside of him each and every day.

As time wore on, he became less annoying to me. It's not that *he* changed--not one little bit! I just got used to him. Before long I was able to learn his sense of humor and mannerisms, and started finding myself laughing at some of the things he'd do.

So to answer your question, I think it's possible to change your mind about someone. I guess it really depends on what they did to put you against them in the first place.

of course.
What would life be like if we remained in our own little judgmental boxes all the time? Pretty boring
I like to coax people out of judgment.... ;)

Of course - I have learned this the hard way - and young people don't often enjoy learning at the feet of their elders... :)

blessings to you :)

I usually have pretty good instincts about people so no I guess I don't.
I have tried, really tried.
I have a co-worker than since I first met him something did not set right with me.
I share an office with him and I can be polite and all but still to this day he rubs me wrong.
Edit to add: Yes indeed I am getting used to him, but it still doesn't change the funny feeling I have about him. We can laugh and kid around and actually have decent conversations but in many ways he still creeps me out.

Sure, I can change my mind. I WANT to like people and get along, so I'd rather be wrong about a person if I've gotten a bad impression of them.

There's a difference though between someone who rubs you the wrong way and someone who has intolerable character flaws. There's principles I'll stand on, but I won't hold someone's quirks or foibles so much against them that I won't give them a second chance....

You know... 4 of my best friends all started out as people who rubbed me the wrong way. I went to highschool with three of them ... we just didn't get along for years. There was some psychological warfare going on, then.

The other, we just never clicked until we sat down and spoke about religion, politics and classic novels.

Now I'm proud to consider them close friends.

I've changed my mind before about someone, but if they rub me the wrong way from the start, the burden is on them.



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