What's a nice way to tell someone to "get a life" without hurting !
Question: This woman saw an article about my singles group in the newspapaper. I was nice and gave her details about our weekly activities, I "host" the Wedenesday night meetings in local restaurants, a guy "hosts" the Happy Hour on Fridays and another lady "hosts" movies at the movie theater on Sundays. The "host" is just responsible for letting new people how to find the group, introducing new people, etc. while the singles that attend pay for their own food, drinks or movie ticket. She's been calling all of us repeatedly just to gab. I get she's lonely but I don't have time to gab, especially with uninteresting people with IQ's below 120. I get that she's lonely and bored but she doesn't even have Internet access so I couldn't tell her to come play on Yahoo Answers with the rest of us. How should I phrase it when I tell her "Quit calling us!" so I don't hurt her tender feelings? The guy from Happy Hour is ready to tell her to "eff off" even though his Lenten resolution was to be nicer!
Answers: This woman saw an article about my singles group in the newspapaper. I was nice and gave her details about our weekly activities, I "host" the Wedenesday night meetings in local restaurants, a guy "hosts" the Happy Hour on Fridays and another lady "hosts" movies at the movie theater on Sundays. The "host" is just responsible for letting new people how to find the group, introducing new people, etc. while the singles that attend pay for their own food, drinks or movie ticket. She's been calling all of us repeatedly just to gab. I get she's lonely but I don't have time to gab, especially with uninteresting people with IQ's below 120. I get that she's lonely and bored but she doesn't even have Internet access so I couldn't tell her to come play on Yahoo Answers with the rest of us. How should I phrase it when I tell her "Quit calling us!" so I don't hurt her tender feelings? The guy from Happy Hour is ready to tell her to "eff off" even though his Lenten resolution was to be nicer!
Fyre that is a difficult one as I don't think there is an 'easy-out' without offending her.
It is clear she has adopted your group as new found friends, and equally clear she probably has no other friends.
I think that someone, or several of you at a meeting explain to her gently that you meet together to exchange chat 3 times a week to hear what the others have been doing during the interim period.
If you are too harsh with her she is going to really feel dumped.
That's hard to handle,,, do you have caller ID? Might want to screen your calls and avoid her if you can... Be nice at the meetings or maybe say something to someone else in front of her about how busy you are and not able to talk on the phone as much as you like, inclued her in on the talk,,, maybe she'll get the hint...
Get a life is just a phrase. putting in nicely to her
Find something else to do, stop bugging me!
or a little bit more rude of a way
Frick off
Can just tell her straight that it's not the responsibilities of the hosts to keep the singles company - they'll have to take the initiative themselves.
Can start by asking her why she's there [singles parties], presumably the answer be meeting with others; then reply the former phrase and tell her hosts are supposed to have a neutral position and so on.
if she's as you said, IQ below 120, she may need something as straight off as that.
I think you are going to have to take a nice, firm, managerial approach with this woman. Her feelings may be hurt, but if she is bugging everyone with her calls, it is something that has to be done, as kindly and politely as possible.
Take her aside and tell her that, within your organization, you do not encourage so many personal calls, that friendships are supposed to develop slowly and between people with shared interests, while she is rushing things with her constant calls.
Tell her that it has been your experience that when members rush into friendships without exploring personal traits and lifestyles, it can lead to uncomfortable situations. Thus, although you appreciate her enthusiasm for your activities, you have to ask her to stop calling, begin to take things slowly, and to develop her friendships within the group without haste and with those who reach out to her.
She may leave the group, or she may decide that this makes sense and stay, but I think the constant phone calls will stop. If you try this and she still continues to make the calls, I think it is well within your rights to tell her bluntly and frankly that she has to leave you and your co-workers alone.
ssay this ,'' i dont know how to say this nicley but you really need to stop calling us get a life and a boyfriend to talk to or a bffl.if you dont wanna say that block her froma all your phones and tell secruity or the person at the front desk not to let her in!!!!