If someone in your office told you that she is in such dire (but temporary) fina!


Question: If someone in your office told you that she is in such dire (but temporary) financial straights that she has
not eaten anything in four days except milk and what she scrounges from the office, and refused to accept a gift of $100 for food, how would you give her a bag of groceries without it being apparent!? It's raining outside so I don't want to leave it by her car, and I don't want to bring it into the office!. I also bought her a grocery store gift card, but I just couldn't not buy her food!. (It's a cultural and religious thing)!.

I would also appreciate some funny answers here; don't let me down, contacts!. And, yes, I do have a lot of punctuation!. Bite!.!.!. me!!!Www@Enter-QA@Com


Answers:
Your pathetic!.!.next you'll be wanting to get in her pants!.!.!.leave the poor girl alone!.!.!.!.let her starve with some dignityWww@Enter-QA@Com

Before I get all smart assy, just let me say that is the sweetest thing ever!. You really are a fantastical human being!.

Alright, now that the sappy **** is out of the way, can you leave when she does and walk outside together and then say "Oh, hold up a sec, I've got something for you"!.

Either that, or you can just follow her home, and then after you sit in her bushes and stare at her for a while, you could put them on the porch, ring the doorbell, and then do a ding dong ditch!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

awww you have such a big heart!!! That's very sweet!!!

You know as psychologist I have to say that if she were really that hungry she would have accepted the card without any hesitation!.
It's not any different than scrounging through the office fridge!

So put it on her desk and eventually she'll use it!!!

I really hate it when people constantly complain about something but when you offer help they won't accept it! (sorry i had to throw that in too)Www@Enter-QA@Com

You wuss!.

<-------------------- Is willing to go to some dark alley and leave it outside her cardboard box for you!. I am also turned on by drug dealers who chase me down the street, and I am used to being stabbed by used syringes and chased by rats the size of toasters!. Eight-slice toasters!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

What a magnanimous gesture!.
I would tell her that eating is important and that it helps function better and be more productive at work and that you do not want to see her jeopardize her job!.
Tell her that it would make you happy if she accepted the food and ask her if she wants to make you unhappy or be disappointed by not taking the food!.
I wish I worked with you!.
Bless you!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

Buy some boxed and canned foods!. Then gift wrap them with a card inside the box, all given anonymously too!.

Make her laugh by also stuffing in one of those exploding snake in a can that should open up when she opens the box!. Always good for a laugh for anyone who see's thisWww@Enter-QA@Com

Leave the grocery card on her desk or put it in an envelope and leave it in her mailbox!.

If you know where she lives, you can ring and run lol!.!.!. when you know she's there, put the bag in front of the door, ring the bell and run!.

Www@Enter-QA@Com

You can rub the peanut butter over yourself, and tell her that she'll be doing you a favor licking it off!. That way, she gets to eat and doesn't feel like a charity case!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

tell her!. 'listen b - yo asse is gettin scrawny!. beef it up,yo!." and shove the bag in her arms,

then run away!.run like the wind!. because if she drops the bag, i'm bettin, her next step will be to smack ya one!. Www@Enter-QA@Com

Buy her breast implants!.
What’s that old saying: “Give a man a fish and he eats for a day!. Teach a man to pole dance with his new tata’s and he can feed himself for a lifetime!.” (Or until his looks start heading south)Www@Enter-QA@Com

Tell the police to send it to her home!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.or maybe tie yourself to her car, you'll let yourself loose only if she accepts the groceries!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.lolWww@Enter-QA@Com

Tell her how you haven't been laid in 18 months and see if you two can work out a compromise!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

just start throwing them at her as she's leaving!.!.!.she'll have to pick it up or get fined for litteringWww@Enter-QA@Com

Tie her up in the dungeon and force her to eat!.Www@Enter-QA@Com

Wonder (hearts) you!.
*hug*
*cry*
*hug*Www@Enter-QA@Com

Maybe $100 was too much for her to accept from you!. Try $50 or something that seems like less of an imposition!. Www@Enter-QA@Com

how about leave them in a trail leading to your naked body!. Www@Enter-QA@Com

I find that 4-slice toasters burn out faster than 2-slice toasters!.!.!.hmmWww@Enter-QA@Com

The Cat has come up with several scenarios!.
1!. When the scrawny wench leaves on a lunch or potty break, simply place the bag on her desk and leave!. It's all anonymous and she won't be ABLE to say no!. You'll have to lie when she asks if it was you, but just play stupid!. You can own up to it later!. And what do you mean it's a religious thing!? You Mormon!?!?!?!?!?!!!!!! People should do stuff like this because they are kind and caring! Not because they think God told them to!. It's awfully wonderful of you either way though!.!.!.

2!. Slam the bag of food down on her desk and say "Take it btch or else" and run out of the room, flailing your arms and squeeling like a gay boy

3!. Give her the bag and say "I had some extra things I didn't need" and simple old up your hand as if to say "talk to the hand" and walk out!. Be sure to give her bedroom eyes!.

4!. Have The Cat deliver it for you!. Because this sounds like such a good cause, he will waive all his usual fees!. He's had to start charging for his services since his human slave is unemployed, but this is a very good cause!. It's like feeding that pregnant young cat in the park!. She probably belongs to someone, but looks skinny!.Www@Enter-QA@Com



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