Survey:What do you think of my story?!
Question: Survey:What do you think of my story!?
This is just a story I made with a sequel:
*FRATH enters the leader's house*
LEADERDUDE: FRATH!?What are you doing here!?Surely an awesome player of Oblivion has no time for a worthless loser like me!.
FRATH: You're right!.I dont have time for you but its about ime I had a talk with you!.Wait what are you hiding in your pocket!?Is that a HAlo 3!?How dare you play a loserish game like Halo 3!?Everyone knows that halo 2 is better because the Master CHief is stronger in that game!
LEADERDUDE: What!?The Master CHEF is awesome in halo 3!.WHat would you know!?
FRATH:Hey its the Master CHief not Master CHEF! Now enough of this were are the group members!?
LEADERDUDE: I sent them out!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.I dont need them anymore especially that DUtchess lady and that gun person!.!.!.!.!.
FRATH: WHat!?How dare you!?Their names are GUNMAN and Syl the duchess of Dementia!. Where did you send them!?
LEADERDUDE: I sent them to get me a big MAC from MCDagon!.Malx is dead though because she couldnt get the french fries I asked for!.
FRATH: What how could you!?
*FRATH punches LEADERDUDE so far that he starts flying and he hits the wall*
LEADERDUDE: Curse you FRATH I shall have my revenge!I shall hit you with my Blade of Woe which I got from the Dark brotherhood!
FRATH: Pffft!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.who cares!.The Dark brotherhood is gay!.And now I will stab you with my pointy blade!.Now die!
*Epic swordfight between FRATH and LEADERDUDE which FRATH wins*
*LEADERDUDE coffs out blood*
LEADERDUDE: How could you FRATH!?I trusted you!
FRATH: Pfft!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.you're a loser!.
LEADERDUDE: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
FRATH: By Sithis shut up!I'm hungry!.I'm gonna go get something to eat
LEADERDUDE: Nooooo! Not my French fries!Nooooooooooooooooooooo!
And so FRATH defeated the evil LEADERDUDE and he stole all his stuff and became the leader of the group!.
To be continoued!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
*FRATH enters the leader's house*
LEADERDUDE: FRATH!?What are you doing here!?Surely an awesome player of Oblivion has no time for a worthless loser like me!.
FRATH: You're right!.I dont have time for you but its about ime I had a talk with you!.Wait what are you hiding in your pocket!?Is that a HAlo 3!?How dare you play a loserish game like Halo 3!?Everyone knows that halo 2 is better because the Master CHief is stronger in that game!
LEADERDUDE: What!?The Master CHEF is awesome in halo 3!.WHat would you know!?
FRATH:Hey its the Master CHief not Master CHEF! Now enough of this were are the group members!?
LEADERDUDE: I sent them out!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.I dont need them anymore especially that DUtchess lady and that gun person!.!.!.!.!.
FRATH: WHat!?How dare you!?Their names are GUNMAN and Syl the duchess of Dementia!. Where did you send them!?
LEADERDUDE: I sent them to get me a big MAC from MCDagon!.Malx is dead though because she couldnt get the french fries I asked for!.
FRATH: What how could you!?
*FRATH punches LEADERDUDE so far that he starts flying and he hits the wall*
LEADERDUDE: Curse you FRATH I shall have my revenge!I shall hit you with my Blade of Woe which I got from the Dark brotherhood!
FRATH: Pffft!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.who cares!.The Dark brotherhood is gay!.And now I will stab you with my pointy blade!.Now die!
*Epic swordfight between FRATH and LEADERDUDE which FRATH wins*
*LEADERDUDE coffs out blood*
LEADERDUDE: How could you FRATH!?I trusted you!
FRATH: Pfft!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.you're a loser!.
LEADERDUDE: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
FRATH: By Sithis shut up!I'm hungry!.I'm gonna go get something to eat
LEADERDUDE: Nooooo! Not my French fries!Nooooooooooooooooooooo!
And so FRATH defeated the evil LEADERDUDE and he stole all his stuff and became the leader of the group!.
To be continoued!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.Www@Enter-QA@Com
Answers:
Haha, that's pretty good!
Www@Enter-QA@Com
Www@Enter-QA@Com
hahahahahah thats good but in the middle some lines became boring!. you should add humor to it!. otherwise your imagintion is awesome!. you are one gifted child!Www@Enter-QA@Com
Too much dialog, no story Www@Enter-QA@Com
Coooooooooooool FRATH!.!.!.!.I never knew u were such a good writer!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.WOW, Marvellous story!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.Hope u write many more stories!!Www@Enter-QA@Com
theres too much talk not enough story line or plot perse Www@Enter-QA@Com
yeahhWww@Enter-QA@Com
ummmm!.!.!.hmmmm!.!.!.!.!.aaa !.!.!.!.!.idk!?Www@Enter-QA@Com
it's good, but there's too much dialogue!.
more like a script than story to me!.!.!.!.!.!.!.
however, i'll give you some suggestions;
001 reduce the length of the dialogues
002 add more sentences, phrases
003 add more colourful words
oh yeah, i think my classmates also play halo 3, but it's a violent game, i guessed!.!.!. is it!?
rachelleWww@Enter-QA@Com
more like a script than story to me!.!.!.!.!.!.!.
however, i'll give you some suggestions;
001 reduce the length of the dialogues
002 add more sentences, phrases
003 add more colourful words
oh yeah, i think my classmates also play halo 3, but it's a violent game, i guessed!.!.!. is it!?
rachelleWww@Enter-QA@Com